..a moment in time..

up up and away..

2010-10-07T22:05:00.000+08:00

blog vs facebook

2010-10-06T21:19:00.000+08:00

i used to think that i might be one of those people who can get past this millenia without having to ever associate myself with Facebook. totally wrong. try again. hehe...

nah, i spent whatever left of my free time mainly in facebook. one, because its easy. all i have to do, is look at my phone, and taadaaaaa, all is there. two, there are always funny people with funny things to say, and some times, i get to be funny too. ha!

me on the facebook, is so different with me on the blog. hypocrite much? no? yes? nah, not really. on the facebook, its me being me on crack. seriously. thats why, i seldom add bloggers i know, as a friend on my facebook. seldom is overstating it. i only add two bloggers i know in my FB, and the turned down many other requests, including Aduka's. funny enough, its like me having two secret, distinctively separate life. which soon, cease to exist. ha!

and yes, the fact that i am talking about my facebook here in my blog, instead of talking about my blog in my facebook, says it all. which is the real me? me here, or me over there?

*ponders for a while*

its been bugging me, really. why cant i be open and honest, like i do now in my blog, to the rest of my friends and families on the facebook. instead, i get to be the happy me over there. happy me on crack, i must say. ha ha ha.

yes, talking about heartaches in front of all the people in this world, so not gonna happen anytime soon. ha!

*pause*

crap. i got caught up in liking quotes in FB. ha ha!
so, i lost my train of thoughts.
continue..... tomorrow? no?
i dont make promises i couldnt keep...
:p

broken

2010-09-06T18:56:00.000+08:00

im one of those ppl who are good at pretending.

hiding.

being a ghost.

in the sense that, i never truly let people knows what inside of me.

or to be precise, i never, almost never let people know

..when im in pain.

as the years go by, im gettin good at camouflaging.

too good im afraid.

way too good that, at a hint of pain, i turn my back.

i always do.

i feigned ignorance.

pretend like i dont give a shit.

when in fact, my heart bleeds a river.

and people thought, i was charming.

funny.

witty with wicked sense of humour.

ppl thought im the one who laughs at everything.

i do laugh. a lot.

but when the laughter fades,

something in me dies too.

im utterly lost.

i only have tomorrow to look forward to.

but what i really want, is to dwell on the past.

i want to cling on the past so much so..

it hurts.

i want to cling to the past because i want to undo all the mistakes that i have done.

i want to undo all the hurts, all the things that i wish i never do.

i wanted a clean break.

a clean slate.

i want a fresh start.

i want to look forward to tomorrow,

but the past is slowly catching up.

im tired of being alone.

no. its not love that i crave.

its weird, but i dont think i am capable of love anymore.

incapable of loving someone...

and incapable of loving back in return.

i feel so cold.

so cold and hard.

i wonder where the girl i used to be.

i used to think that love conquers all.

i used to think that love is sacred.

none of this mattered anymore.

now that i have said it out loud,

it broke my heart to acknowledge the fact that,

to admit this to myself,

i am broken.

third attempt

2010-08-12T20:09:00.000+08:00

this is my feeble third attempt.

i'm thinking about you...
and trying hard..
not to miss you.

second attempt

2010-08-08T22:17:00.000+08:00

ok, this is now my second attempt.
i had these stream of conciousness just begging for me to think it all over.
for quite some time, there is this one thing that bugs me the most.

i.am.wild.

and not in a good way.
although i tried hard to make myself go soft..
i ended up being unpredictably wild.
and rude.
but like usual, i chalked it up to me being...
cool.

which sucks.
cause being cool, is seriously over-rated.

for a second attempt, i suck big time. lol.

first attempt.

2010-08-08T20:57:00.000+08:00

this is my first attempt to write.
tho i dont think its gonna work.
its just that my heart isn't into it.
i'll do the second attempt soon.
thanks for being here.
but then again, why are you even here?
:p

ryyan unplugged.

2010-05-21T17:59:00.000+08:00

2 months old ryyan laughing out loud with his daddy.
long live the superior gene! muahahahaha

drawn together.. and not pulling away

2010-05-13T20:45:00.000+08:00

catchy, yeah?
twas a tagline from the season finale of TVD.
drawn together.. and not pulling away.
have no idea why this line made me think.
and no, im not drawn to anything or anyone.

this week has been a total blast.
meaning, i keep making money. haha.
anyway, i was rearranging my future.
meaning, planning on what the hell am i gonna do with the rest of my life
which, is a loooooong way to go. assuming i didnt get hit by a truck.
so i've decided.
but im not gonna share it just yet.
haha.

anyway, tonight at 8pm in the USA, the season finale for TVD will be aired.
means i have to wait till tomorrow night before i'll be able to download it.
by then everybody else in this world would know what already happened.
and i will have more restraint so that i wont peek at the synopsis etc.

ok, myself is getting boring.
but, this is all i've got at the moment.
so, later.

say all i need

2010-05-09T09:00:00.000+08:00

woke up early.
as usual i guess.
took a long walk to stretch my legs.
while walking, this song kept echoing in my head..

"Do you know where your heart is?

Do you think you can find it?
Or did you trade it for something
Somewhere better just to have it?

Do you know where your love is?
Do you think that you lost it?
You felt it so strong, but
Nothing's turned out how you wanted

Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold...."

enjoy.

so, here it goes..

2010-05-08T20:08:00.001+08:00

im not sure whether im having premonition, deja vu or maybe im a clairvoyant?
laughs out loud.
anyway, i have one of those loooooong day.
but, im loving it.
i never wanted to be an agent of any type of brands or products or whatnots.
capitalism. remember?
laughs.
but, heres the thing.
i signed up to be an agent of HR products.
only because, after thorough observation using my mom as the chck points, im declaring that the products actually worked as claimed.
so kudos to HR.
so im officially selling all those goat products and such.
and heres another thing.
in two weeks im buying myself some goats.
on cue, people, laugh out loud. haha
so anyway, this is only a pet project. im fascinated by goats at the moment.
weird, definitely weird.
do you know that goat's milk is the second best milk after breast's milk?
i never knew this before.
so, i thought come next school holiday, im gonna hop down into the department of veterinary, yup, jabatan haiwan, to see what kind of goat that is worth to be bought.
nah, im not looking into a massive production of goats. just gonna buy 1 male and two females and breed them.
oh no, theres no way in hell im gonna touch them. goat are gross. ewww. im gonna send them right away to my grandfather at his kampung and ask him to take care of the goats since he got nothing else to do. heh.
so anyway, maybe if they breed, i'd be a breeder one day. haha.
this is all becauuse i have no desire to stick my neck and live a life in a city so im going all backwards.

last but not least.
i know im gonna regret this.
im gonna regret this soon after i hit the PUBLIST POTS button.
but what the hell.
once is too many times already.
but err..
i kinda miss you.

crazee iz what crazee doezzzzz..

2010-05-07T18:36:00.000+08:00

okay im in a good mood.
full stomach.
good day.
and its friday!!
and its the day when i can download the latest episode of TVD. woohoo...
im downloading it as i speak, so to speak, but i cant wait for it to finish in another hour and a half. im crazeeeee about TVD. and im about to shit in my pants, so to speak, coz the tweets from the cast and the writers make the waiting such an unbearable pain in the ass.

cant wait to see damon aka ian somerhalder. cant wait to see alaric as well, the hot, lushy butt of a historian. hihi. owh, cant wait to see stefan brooding again. stefan should just kill himself so damon can be with elena. haha. i wrote about this already, didnt i?

so dude and dudettes, if u are as crazee as i am, lets watch TVD. next week is the season finale. season 2 TVD starts in september. but i dont mind. in june, True Blood is coming back for their 3rd season. woohooo. cant wait to see what happen to Bill after he proposed to Sookie. well, some asshole kidnapped Bill when Sookie went to the toilet. what a bummer. and also in june, we get an extra dose of edward cullen. again. i hope this eclipse is better than new moon.

brunch, anyone?

2010-05-02T13:18:00.000+08:00

so, its one o'clock in the afternoon.
lo and behold, im still firing up on all gears.
so i decided i should just go out take a walk n get me some food.
maybe, if i eat and stuff myself, i'd finally go to sleep.
and that reminds me, i didnt eat anything since...
..friday! yep, last meal was on friday. check.
so here it is, the perfect singleton's sunday brunch.
sayur kacang and daging masak merah complete with chocolate ice with extra cream.
i'm gonna stuff myself.
coming right up!

this is bad.

2010-05-02T10:03:00.000+08:00

real bad..
its a minute to ten in the morning.
but i havent shown any sign of fatigue.
not even a tiny inclination to suggest that i might fall asleep any minutes from now.
all i kept thinking was..
i wanted to drink more.
sigh...
i am so gonna regret this when my eyes go all fluffy tomorrow.

so, here's the thing.

2010-05-02T09:54:00.000+08:00

it's eight in the morning.
and my body is so revved up.
my eyes are wide awake.
i felt so... alive.

i will regret this state of conciousness over some time tomorrow when i have to stay on my feet for 16 hours. shouldnt have drank all those coffee. what a bummer.

but here's the thing that somehow cheer up my day and night.
you know how hooked up i am now with TVD.
duhh~~ TVD? The Vampire Diaries. haha. gotcha!

so i was awake all night long.
with nothing to do.
except staring at my screen. no, i lied. i watched True Blood. again.
aside of that, i keep on checking my twitter page.
i was actually checking up on iansomerhalder.
ian was one of those people who is using twitter to update ppl about something other than himself.
which is a rare quality in a breather since he IS a striving star with millions of fans worldwide.
the way he kept twittering about asking ppl to check on those CNN reports on the oil spillage near Mexican Gulf is so heartbreaking.
and he literally begged ppl to go to this animal center in Atlanta to adopt a pet, WHICH by the way, got no respons at all! he ACTUALLY went there himself but no one showed up.
i guess he had scores of fans, but no one is bothered to care about adopting a pet.
i think thats awfully nice of him to actually care.
he even took a short video documenting his visit to the center.
sweeeeettt...

aches

2010-05-02T07:21:00.001+08:00

its seven in the morning.
havent slept a second since last night.
drank too much caffeine. i had six long shots bottoms up too many. or was it seven?eight?
i.. dont know.. why i drank that much.
its just that..
i dont wanna sleep.
i couldnt take my mind of things.
of you.
no. i lied.
i stayed awake.
so that i can keep on thinking.
feeling.
sensing.
knowing.
waiting.
hurting.
missing...

sparkplug

2010-04-26T19:32:00.000+08:00

yesterday..

i was being my usual self on weekend.yeap. the lazy me. i hate cooking if im the only one whose gonna eat so i settle for a simple nasi campur take away. as usual, i have this one cafe that i frequented every weekend. so yesterday, it was packed. u see, im the kind of person who are crowdaphobic. wahahahaha. i made that word up. i hate crowds but i was so hungry i decided i'll just barge in. so, there was this well dressed fella who serves me. i was a bit perplexed because he was too nicely dressed to be just a waitress? but, who cares. as long as i got my nasi campur.

"cik nak nasi?"
"ha ah."
"makan sini or take away?" wooo. slalu orang cakap makan sini ke bungkus.
"tapau."
"nak nasi banyak ke sikit?" seriously, what kind of question is that? if i said banyak, i will look like crap, if i said sikit, i will look like someone who control-control.
"banyak." damn. the guy actually smirk. SMIRK not smile. i gave him my non-chalant, no expression, blank face with no sign that i saw his SMIRK.
"cik nak lauk ape?" i pointed at what looks like kari ayam n sayur kacang buncis.
"makan kambing yer?"
"owh. ingatkan ayam. x pe, bg saya ayam masak kicap jer la."
"minum?"
"air mineral je. botol besar. tq." wahahahaha. i am so lazy i didnt even bother to boil water.
"semuanya rm5.50" another smirk. fuh.. what a weird guy.

today...

i was sweeping the floor when suddenly, a kid run towards me.
"akak! akak! pakcik saya suruh bagi ni.." cool.. another paper with a handphone no written nicely.
"sapa pakcik kamu ni?"
"pakcik suruh akak telepon dulu."
"aik? alah bg tahu la. akak kasik 50sen." wahahahahahaa..
"pakcik sy yang jual nasi campur dgn akak." damn..
"camana plak dia tahu akak niaga sini?"
"saya la bg tahu.. hahaahaha.. akak, sy nak 50 sen.."

as usual, i took the paper.
and as usual too, i lost it.
and yeah, i have to switch cafe from this weekend onwards.
what a bummer. i like that cafe because it was easy to find parking spot.

and, if i were to entertain every single paper with a handphone no written on it, i'd probably have two or three kids by now. i dont know why i didnt take the chance. or maybe, it was fate preventing me from doing exactly that. heh. easy peasy. blame it on Fate. haha.

eh. and why is this entry titled sparkplug? i was reminiscing something my dear friend said to me last night. it goes something like this..

she: boring giler single nih. yg asik ngorat aku seme laki orang. diorang saja nak menggatal ngan aku sbb bini diorang kat kl.
me: hahaha. very funny mik.. jgn layan jantan miang. carik penyakit namanya tu.
she: hahahah.. aku tak kesah jadik bini no 2.. janji diorang ada duit..
me: kalau mcm tu, make sure ko jadik bini no 2 or no 3. janji ko la bini muda forever. hahaha...
she: tuh la.. weyyy ko lak camner. takde org ngorat ke...
me: bese2 la. maleh nak layan.
she: apa kes yg cikgu tu...
me: blablablablablablablabla... takde spark.. aku pon tatau kenapa. takde feeling ler beb. maybe aku ni mental. hahahaha
she: kalau takde spark, ko tukar sparkplug je. hahahaha..

it was funny while it last. and the truth is, it wasn't so funny now. i mean, if u wanna 'start' a 'relationship', it should be something that 'entice' you. not something that we picked out randomly. not something that we pick because we are bored. not something that we start because we are scared that we are gonna be left behind. i mean, im in my LATE twenties. but STRANGE, i didnt feel like it. haha.

i'd probably WILL regret this but heck, im gonna write it anyway. when i said SPARK, i really mean it. it was hard to get to know someone if you dont feel that SPARK of attraction. nah, u might think im CHOOSY (is that a word?) but no, it wasnt about being too cerewet. nah. its like, u know someone for a minute, an hour, a day and BAM!! u feel that connection. as if there was just something about them that keeps you wanting to know more. and even after you learn everything about them, you'd still see the spark. its like being on the opposite side of the world but having something in common. and the best SPARK is when both of you feel the same way.. wooo... cheesy. hehe..

and of course, for some known or unknown reason, we have to come back to the reality of it all. Not All Spark Produce Flame. what a bummer. sometimes, lack of oxygen could caused the flame to burn out. haha..

but seriously guys, im all for the spark thingy.
oh heck. why the hell am i thinking about you?

facebook? anyone?

2010-04-25T13:57:00.000+08:00

due to some sense on insecurity, i decided not to publish my facebook. haha.
but i'll publish the snapshot of my new info.

yeap. that would summarize the kind of person i am. haha.

my new obsession

2010-04-25T13:44:00.000+08:00

i figured, since im writing craps, i might as well throw more craps while i still have some time to kill.

for the past few months, im kinda obsessed with all this vampires stuff. muahaha.
laugh all you want. dissin' me wont do you or me any good. as i grow older, i find myself to be desensitize. im more mean now. haha. yeappp. instead of becoming like a lady that im supposed to, im becoming someone else. i've nurtured the mean-me to the level that im so comfortable being mean. and rude. huahuahua.

im more...
sharp tounge (read: my words hurt people lately.)
rough.
heartless.

wooo. whats happening to me?
anyhow, thats for later.

my new obsession would be all things related to vampires. haha. of course, tv shows. you see, i dont have the luxury to befriend people, most of my friends are either married or so far away tending to their own single minded singletons. yeapp. this singletons crap would fit another entry.

like i said before i got sidetracked, im loving all these vampires stuff to the extent that im opening a twitter account so that i can keep track on whats happening with the cast. woohoo. if thats not obsession, than please do tell me what was that because i cant wait for the next episode of vampire diaries. lucky me because come next monday, times flew so fast its soon be thursday where the new episode will air on CW network. dont bother flipping your channel, CW is not on Astro. haha.

anyhow, things i love about this show that its got plots that aint static, every episodes keeps you wanting for more. haha. cliche. so unlike malaysian drama. urgh. (suddenly, i have this annoying flashback of nurkasih). well, wont waste my time dissin' about nurkasih again. been there done that. if you happen to watch it too, then you'll know that the evil brother Damon, is looking more dashing and kinder too which earn a soft spot with me too, like the millions of viewers who beginning to vote for Team Damon on facebook. (yes people, im spending more time on my facebook, as oppossed to my stand b4). and the good brother, Stefan, is beginning to bore me. maybe Stefan should just kill himself.

Its one mroe season to the season finale.*sigh..* afterthat, no more vamp shows for me. i have to wait till next June for the new season of TrueBlood. cant wait to see Bill COmpton and Sookie again. And yes, comes next June too, Twilight Saga continue. Eclipse, the third installment of the series is released. now, i used to be so enarmoured with this Twilight thing, but the more i watch vampire diariees and trueblood, the more i realized, what an idiot both this Edward and Bella. haha. nah.. new moon was a disapointment for me. I hope eclipse will be better. hopefully.

not bad for a piece of crap.
haha.

poets and craps

2010-04-25T12:49:00.000+08:00

i used to be a poet.
yeepppp.
that was when i was feeling heartbroken.
or sad.
or have this ample emotion that i just have to share with you.

but.
when i un-poet myself.
i find myself to be..
writing craps.
yup.
poet turns crap.

haha.

rise and shine

2010-04-24T17:13:00.000+08:00

its been a while.
i know.
24 hours a day is almost insufficient.

i wanted to write, but the lack of ideas, urges and times have negatively impact my decision of never to bother again.

i dont even bother to read news.
i dont even know whats happening in the big bad world out there.
i am so totally clueless.
i go online everyday, but i only open my facebook to see the updates from family and friends.
and of course, i go online to download all those shows that i missed because i spent almost 16 hours a day working.

i am so focus on working.
day in and day out.
its so refreshing not having to think about anything at all.

and so, couple of days ago, i wanted to start writing again.
and so, i tried to find a one template that will be THE one.
and fudge.
its so hard to find THE one.
can i say that looking for THE one template that will satisfy you is the same like looking for THE ONE MR Right?

so yeah, maybe i'll continue later.

definitely maybe.
because..
maybe is a few steps up from no.
but..
its also a million steps down from definite.

haha.

nightmare

2010-03-21T22:00:00.000+08:00

since im a loner and always alone (but never lonely), i got no one else to share my perverted nightmare. so i just have to jot this one down. coz i cant bear having to replay the scene over and over in my head.

not so many nights ago, i got this really pervert dream. no, having a perverted nightmare doesnt make me a pervert. its just so happen that i am so 'geli' after i woke up.

not so long ago i came to know this one guy. lets call him Encik H. but try as i might, there are certain aspects of him that really gets on my nerve. ok, i shouldnt list down everything in details, cause there is a chance i might puke on my pillow, but seriously, when he is around, i feel 'geli'.

so back to my dream. all i remembered was, i was playing with some kids, location at my kampung. i was dressed in my usual torn jeans n t shirt, i was bare foot, muds all over my cloth, feet dirty with soil and my hair is totally messed up as i played with the kids. suddenly, there was this big car (model unknown), stopped and parked in front of us.

i looked up and saw Encil H came out of the car, wearing light brown suit, hair combed nicely, smiling. the part where i want to kill myself is that, in my dream, i thought he looked OK, where in real life, i might thought that accidentally spilled oil on his hair.

so he walked towards me, and suddenly, he was standing so close to me! as if we r going to kiss?? ewwwww.. i hate this part!! demm!! in my stupid perverted dream, Encik H picked few strands of my hair and tuck it behind my ears!! and he even try to brushed off some dirt on my shirt and dusted off some stupid leaves on my hair.

ewwwww gross!

why cant i dream about richard cypher or even darken rahl????

shit. i am so dem geli now.

but the second part where i want to kill myself now is the fact that, in that dream, i cant remember feeling angry when he did that!! ewwwww.. did i actually like that in my dream. dem!!

if u think thats romantic, please, spare me this. its only romantic if u fancy the guy. if its not, its gross.

huh. finally.

welcome baby ryan!

2010-03-16T09:46:00.000+08:00

ahh.. where do i begin. so many things happen lately. i'll cut to the chase la. today is the 3rd day im in labuan, visiting again our firstborn nephew, muhammad ryan, born on 5th march. ryan@ian sgt comel. mcm mama dia jugak. thank god, ryan tak itam dah mcm bapak nya. hahaha...

we drove all the way to kk then to menumbok and caught the 5pm ferry from menumbok to labuan . we choose to drive so easier to get around later. it turns out that, there were no other passenger on that day,so we got the ferry all to ourselves. but i was already so tired from the 6 hours driving, i just wish the ferry would sail faster. we arrive at labuan jetty at around 8pm, because apparently, the ferry was not given permission to dock due to some error.

most of the time we just stay at home looking after jane who is still sore from the operation, but shes gaining strength. mom is here since before, so she is getting enough rest. baby ryan is the most happy baby i ever see. he didnt cry, and he sleeps a lot too. mom have to wake him up so that she could bath him. so funny. he'd cry a little when mom wake him up, but then he'll open his eyes and stay calm. in the morning when he wakes up, he smiles a lot. so funny. sengih smpi nampak gusi tuuu.. hahaha..

i remembered something from before.. when ryan is a week overdue from birth, the doc is already worried. i placed a call to my grandmother in indonesia, and she told me, its in our 'genetic/keturunan' that most women in our family carry the pregnancy till 10-12 months. grandma said, she carried my mother until 12 months into pregnancy. some people called it 'bunting kerbau'. so by right, we shuldnt worry lah, but it so happen that ryan poo poo while still inside. bless him.

so tomorrow we'll be heading back to kk. i dread the driving and the ferry. i once enjoy ferry rides, but laltely, i cant bear sitting for so long. i usually enjoy stillness and quiet, but lately, i just wanna get it over with. got some pictures, but im way too lazy to upload it. ryan's pic is in my facebook, look it up. if u havent got it, then it wasnt meant for u to see. wahahahaha

cheerios!

ya Allah,take care of my sister..

2010-03-05T21:43:00.000+08:00

Ya Allah,
Have mercy on my sister,
Let all be good for her,
Let the operation be successful,
Take care of her and the baby..

I may never be the most faithful servant,
But for all the wrongs that I've done,
All im asking is this..
let my sister live safe and sound..
is all im asking..

Take away everything that I have..
Even my future, even my life..
I wont even blink an eye...
but please ya Allah..
Let my sister live through this..

Jane has been admitted into the hospital since yesterday. But till now, the labor has not started yet. Worst, the baby already start to suffocate in his own liquids and mess. So Jane will undergo operation. I wish I can fly over tonite, but I have to wait till the morning.. If you read this, pray for my sister, Jennifer and her unborn baby...

its not worth it. seriously. dont.

2010-02-22T23:20:00.000+08:00

this piece caught my attention.

Stesen radio kini diwajib putar lagu baru artis tempatan

22/02/2010 8:08pm

KUALA LUMPUR 22 Feb. – Mulai 1 Mac ini, semua stesen radio diwajibkan memutarkan lagu-lagu daripada album atau “single” terbaru artis tempatan untuk tempoh tertentu, kata Menteri Penerangan Komunikasi dan Kebudayaan, Datuk Seri Dr. Rais Yatim.
Beliau berkata, langkah itu juga akan menjadi antara syarat pemberian lesen stesen radio dan beliau percaya pemegang lesen stesen radio tidak akan keberatan untuk mematuhi arahan itu.

Arahan itu akan dikuatkuasakan mengikut Seksyen 33 Akta Komunikasi dan Multimedia (AKMM) 1998 supaya stesen radio mempromosikan lagu-lagu tempatan memandangkan usaha itu didapati masih kurang diutamakan, katanya.

seriously?
so now, whenever i turn on the radio, i'd be listening to some ~~shit~~ song that i seriously didnt enjoy? please. please. please. listening to radio while driving is one of my favorite thing to do. its the only time where i can sit without hearing unwanted voices. sitting inside my car is like being in a sanctuary. serene but not without mission.

i think this rais fella wanted us to listen to MORE malay song instead of indonesian song. so, do i give a shite about entertainment industry in malaysia especially the long list of not really talented singers and throne of actors and actresses who cant act but seriously want to act? and to top it off, who are not really pretty but people thought they were pretty because they wear spaghetti strap and wear an inch thick make up.

i seriously dont give a shite. i make it a point, like my personal thing NOT TO TUNE INTO ANY MALAY SPEAKING DJ's RADIO. here are my reasons. you may or may not agree with me.

1. i dont like to listen to malay songs. now, dont go around calling me racist. i have my reason for not wanting to listen to malay songs, especially the new ones sang by those who called themselves singers because they won some stupid reality shows,
that manipulate the entire stupid malaysians into voting them to be the winner. these type of singers, can go fly kites.

2. because, if i listen to malay radio channels, i have to sit through some songs that really shouldnt be recorded at all. i remembered one night, i heard this song by some lady.. the lyrics still haunt me till today. the lyrics goes something like this..

"bayangkan diriku..tapak sulaiman..."

and i thought, what the fudge?

we, malaysians have to bear and listen to this type and level of song, sang by mediocre voice, who dress themselves as if they were born american, i mean.. seriously. now the government wanna make it compulsory for radio stations to air all the new songs, which i can guarantee, will defnitely stink to high heaven.

3. now this third reason is basically why I AM SO NOT GOING TO TUNE IN TO MALAY SPEAKING RADIO. except klasik nasional. i can bear listening to the DJ of klasik nasional, but ERA? MuzikFM? if i accidentally tune into these channel, i might accidentally puke.
have u paid attention to their morning shows, especially ones where they pick an issue, and have those ~~losers~~ callers talking and telling them stories. i remembered this particular day i was driving around in KK with jane, and we ACCIDENTA~~LLY~~ tune into ERA, the morning show, which im not what it was called. i just say it was morning show because it whas a program aired in the morning.

and the topic ranges from pernahkah anda menduakan pasangan anda? bagaimanakah anda mengelak dari kantoi? ceritakan pengalaman anda sehingga anda boleh pasang dua.

seriously, topic like this, is really insulting. come on la, they even have people calling and discussing about how great it was to be in two relationship, one mutually exclusive of the other. and those gedik female will giggle and laughing and share their secrets of having two guys go crazy over them but eventually have to choose one. and also those story about married female who falles for anothermarried male.

seriously? dicussing this and choosing this as an issue of great importance to be discussed in public? and we lament about social problems?

give me a break.

i know, i know, you might say, those type of radio are for entertainment purposes, programmmes pick to suit the listeners, blablabla. yeah, i agreed. they choose their content based on how receptive will the audience be. but of course, its my right not to be subjected by these degrading, sorry excuse of entertainment.

no way jose.

thats why i love the morning show by these tro DJs from traxx FM. i dont bother to know their names, but i listen to them every morning. they are funny without insulting my intelligence. plus they gave out funny facts which makes me laugh hard. and also, they dont really talk that much, because probably, they realize that people only tune it to traxx fm for their delicous long list of current english songs that are great to listen to. unlike some radio channel who prefer to blabbing about aper yang anaa buat bersama kekasih anda pada malam Valentine?

so please, whatever this rais yatim try to do, i hope it will not affect english channel because apparently, he was referring to many malay singers whoc ant sell their album.

daripada dgr lagu malaysia, might as well dengar lagu indon.

live, life, love.

2010-02-14T06:45:00.000+08:00

still got few minutes more to spare before i packed all my laptops and peripherals.

live and let live.
have expectation from life, but dont expect too much. it will only lead to disapointment. but of course, never cease hoping.

"what happened to all the cool people in the world?"
"nothing happen to them. you just have too high expectation.."

:)

i'be gone for a while. thanks for visiting. i have this couple daily visits from UK and Germany, and i wish i knew who you guys were, but thanks all the same. and to the Jabatan Siasatan Jenayah Komersil Bukit Aman fella, i have no idea what you are doing here reading my ramblings, but you wont find anything illegal here. and i thought police are supposed to be real smart and all.and please, i got no picture anywhere in my blog, i aint that stupid. and the picture you were showing my 'friend'? it wasnt me. i'd save you the trouble but you wont find my pic anytime soon. i'm really a private person. if you are smart enough to find my blog, i'd trust that you are smart enough to get my phone no. you are of course welcome to call me if you got any question, and please dont pretend that you are interested with our t shirt, its kinda lame. though i have no idea what good will that do, but dont expect me to come running to you. i got better things to do. or so i pretend.

**********************************
and of course, i'm going to miss you so much.

i wish..
for so many things..
but really..
..at this moment..
all i wish for..
is just..
to see you.

take care all..

leaving on a jet plane

2010-02-14T05:41:00.000+08:00

-i dont really sleep well last nite. all this mercun, fireworks were so bloody loud. im a light sleeper by nature, so its like a torture to try to sleep with all this commotion outside.

-mom called last night. im still reevaluating. booked the ticket already, but im not sure im going.. i dunno why i hesitate on leaving.

"maybe because this is not leaving.. this is like running away.."

bags are all packed. err, not really bags. just one bag. i travel light. i'll get some more cloth when i reached there. yesterday i got extra locks and deadbolts for some doors. so i spent hours yesterday installing locks and bolts myself. im impressed with myself! haha..

stocked up some groceries n fruits in the fridge for my parents when they got home, in case my parents come home late. holiday season, burglars everywhere.

- my sisters text me and asked me am i really going? actually, i dont feel like going, because i dont want to. why am i hesitating so much?

"you are scared you are going to miss him more.."

maybe, going away isnt such a bad idea after all..

:)

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I'll tell you now, they don't mean a thing

Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I'll wear your wedding ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I'll be on my way

Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

sharing session: cerita kunyit

2010-02-13T16:24:00.000+08:00

salah satu favret food i, is ayam goreng rempah mamak. nih fav dr dulu. so jap td tgh boring2, teringat nak surf resepi dia kengkonon..(which is so funny..coz wats the point? dah berbulan rasanya tak pijak dapur rumah sndiri.. :p)

anyway, i stumbled upon this blog.
http://balannambiar.wordpress.com/category/resipi-nasi-kandar-asli/

I quote:

Kunyit mengandungi bahan antiseptik yang baik untuk membunuh bakteria yang terdapat didaging ayam

it brings back memories. masa kecik dulu, my father bela banyak burung merpati. some of them were stray birds, injured birds yg my father letak dlm sangkar, n bela sampai burung tu boleh terbang semula. i used to watch my father tepek serbuk kunyit n ikat mana-mana parts yg luka dgn serai yg dibubuh kunyit paste. i asked my father, kunyit tu bukan untuk masak ke pa? my father ckp, kunyit ni untuk healing broken bones and cuts..

but it never occur to me back then la. hari ni bila teringat semula, i googled kunyit@tumeric healing properties associated with it being an antiseptic..

if you are interested, this might be a good read:

http://www.nzhealth.net.nz/herbs/turmeric.shtml
http://www.healthdiaries.com/eatthis/20-health-benefits-of-turmeric.html

here are some of the 20 benefits of taking kunyit@tumeric.

Here are 20 reasons to add turmeric to your diet:

1. It is a natural antiseptic and antibacterial agent, useful in disinfecting cuts and burns.

2. When combined with cauliflower, it has shown to prevent prostate cancer and stop the growth of existing prostate cancer.
3. Prevented breast cancer from spreading to the lungs in mice.
4. May prevent melanoma and cause existing melanoma cells to commit suicide.
5. Reduces the risk of childhood leukemia.
6. Is a natural liver detoxifier.
7. May prevent and slow the progression of Alzheimer's disease by removing amyloyd plaque buildup in the brain.
8. May prevent metastases from occurring in many different forms of cancer.
9. It is a potent natural anti-inflammatory that works as well as many anti-inflammatory drugs but without the side effects.
10. Has shown promise in slowing the progression of multiple sclerosis in mice.
11. Is a natural painkiller and cox-2 inhibitor.
12. May aid in fat metabolism and help in weight management.
13. Has long been used in Chinese medicine as a treatment for depression.
14. Because of its anti-inflammatory properties, it is a natural treatment for arthritis and rheumatoid arthritis.
15. Boosts the effects of chemo drug paclitaxel and reduces its side effects.
16. Promising studies are underway on the effects of turmeric on pancreatic cancer.

17. Studies are ongoing in the positive effects of turmeric on multiple myeloma.
18. Has been shown to stop the growth of new blood vessels in tumors.
19. Speeds up wound healing and assists in remodeling of damaged skin.
20. May help in the treatment of psoriasis and other inflammatory skin conditions.

so there you go, next time nak masak kari ke gulai ke, be sure to add tumeric. nak goreng ayam ke goreng ikan ke, tambah lg kunyit..

:)

my father..

2010-02-12T22:05:00.000+08:00

there are times when i enjoy conversing with my father.
there are also times when i dont particularly enjoy the experience.

my father is a man of the highest integrity i've ever known personally (since i dont really know that many people, so my father is the perfect example). in his line of duty, there are so many occasion that people always 'push envelope that contains valuable' to get their fair share of certain 'somethings'.

i was telling my father of how one perfect afternoon, i walked right into a restaurant where a YB, which was his childhood friend, was throwing a 'lunch party'. of course he recognized me, but, it is in my nature to ignore every politician, especially ones whom i knew for a fact, didnt do a thing to ensure the welfare of the rakyat in our area. be as it may that he is my father's childhood friend, to me, he's just another 'asshole'.

so imy father told me whether i was inclined to join his fellow childhood friend. i told him, the politician can kiss my pretty ass (of course, being a daughter, i rephrase these..) i couldnt care less, really. then my father told various stories of 'bribery' & 'corruption' that span his lifetime.

there was this particular favorite of mine. once, a towkay asked permission from my father to expand his hotel premises, but he didnt own that piece of property next to him. it was in my father's power to authorize the usage of that piece of property, so the towkay promised monthly 'allowances', promised to build new fancy fences and gates, and bla bla bla.. which obviously, my father gladly refused. i asked him, why not just take it? no one will know.. haha. my father told me, its not about whether we can cover our tracks, but its the fact that knowing we did something evil, that being dishonest, living without integrity, is not something that my father will ever considered.

i cherished all men and women, who despite all hardship in their life, has been able to remain true and honest to themselves. we might not live in a big fancy houses, drive the most technically advance cars, but rest assured, living based on the highest moral ground, is living a rich life where no evil is lurking. and i feel sorry for those politicians who lived ina big fancy houses, earning wealth from their evil deeds.. how did they cope with being dishonest all the time?

i mean, how did they teach their kids? what did they say to their kids about morality? ethics? what did they say to their kids about heaven and hell?

i had fun today

2010-02-12T19:00:00.000+08:00

..or as close as it gets to fun. literally..

so today i woke up early. its a habit. im so used to waking up right before dawn, so its hard to linger in bed pretending to be asleep. so i went out to the workshop, get post-check-up, evaluating the car performance after massive parts replacement and few upgrades. the cdi still sounded like it wasnt really tight. so i get those boys to get dirty again. i paid a lot to get the car back on its 4 wheels so i am sooo not going to tolerate anything less than perfection.

then i went to a relative house, its located next to the beach where i usually have my morning run. but today, i dont plan on running. i bought few kuih muih n off i went to visit them. after small talks (i am not big on small talks), went to take a short walk at the beach. it was so windy, and the sky darkened in no time. i wanted to spend more time just sitting there doing nothing but the weather was going rough and the sea turned a shade murky. its a sign for me to go home.

mom called and asked me to pick her up at the clinic. went to get her, and she said she wanted to go to the fish market. oh no.. i always avoid going into any kind of shopping with my mother, be it for cloth, shoes, fishes or vegies. told my mom to hurry while i waited in the car, and she replied..

"buat apa mak nak lama2 dalam pasar ikan, bukannya harum pun pun pasar ni.."

and she emerged, 40 minutes later with only 3 kg's of fishes.
women.. what is so interesting in shopping for 3kgs of fishes that it has to be more than 10minutes?

i hate shopping. n waiting. i have very low tolerance on ppl who have the habit of walking aimlessly admiring stuff in the shops (also known as window shopping). i mean, its not like you havent bought anything in ur life, why on earth would i be indecisive the next time im making the same shopping trip?

it beats me.

well, the true fun is when i got home, and read AT's blog.
i was laughing. mom keep asking me whats so funny. told her there is this one funny guy who are kinda entertaining..

well, lets just leave it at that.

:)

btw, what i so loved about friday, besides the obvious, of course, today is the day when new episodes of vampire diaries are released. i have just finished downloading episode 14 of vampire diaries. cant waittttt to watch it later tonite. but before that, i have to go out for a while again.

so maybe holiday without work isnt so bad after all.

i just have to pretend like everything is picture perfect.
easy peasy.

i am so jealous. i am green with envy.

2010-02-12T12:38:00.000+08:00

i envy the state of kelantan and the state of perak.
i envy the people who were led by virtue of islamic leaders.
i envy the moment where they pray together.
i envy the moment where they all pray together to get the oil royalty.
i envy the moment where the leaders launch 'bulan galakan sembahyang'.
i envy the state where they got more mosques than churches.

i am so green with envy.

sadness

2010-02-12T01:06:00.002+08:00

there are reasons why i hate being out of work.
working long hours is a cure.
it blocks all unwanted emotion.
a way to channel excess energy.
a diversion.
a coping mechanism.
at the end of the day, all is left is just fragments.

*************************

every time i think of him, there is this sadness that washed over me.
its like standing near a sea shore, trying to enjoy the sun, and suddenly, a tide of waves come...
you stood firm on ur feet, but the current was way too strong.
and the waves just swept you away..

*************************

some time ago..

"what happened??"
"it was over."
"how do you know..??"
"he told me so."
"how so???"
"he said never to wait for him.."
"HE TOLD YOU WHAT??"
"he said never to wait for him, and told me to go on with my life.. and its such a waste of time.."
"waste of time??"
"yup.. maybe i waste his time for nothing.."
"MAYBE?? DID YOU ASK HIM?? WHAT DID HE SAY??"
"nothing.. i kept quiet."
"WHY??"
"i was embarassed to ask anything.. plus i dont really know what to say"
"for a smart girl, you can be really stupid"
"i dont know how to respond.."
"but you like him, right???"
"always will"
"hmm.. and u still miss him???"
"all the time"
"i think you should talk to him to clear things out la"
"he dont really like me that way, i think.. my fault i guess"
"then i think you should let him go.. maybe he's not the one"
"i tried.. i just like him so much"
"did you love him?"

"......"

musings

2010-02-11T17:20:00.000+08:00

first day of the holiday. and i am already bored.

i used to start my day at around 4am, come home at almost 7pm. daily. from mon to sat. on sunday, i got my weekly run, do some compulsory itemised shopping. then i sleep.
i usually woke up around 3.50am, took a quick shower, dressed in my 'work cloths' (aka jeans n shirt), grab my keys and off i go.

usually, when i got home, i switched on my laptop and took shower while its starting up.
and then i logged on the net, surf for news, blog hopping, till i got real sleepy, and off i sleep.
and that will sum up my activites for the day.

and now im on holiday, im totally bummed.
clueless.
without work.
i feel so bloody empty.
n bored.

****************************************

for today.
i run in the morning. the usual route.
then i went to the workshop that i frequented. today, got my timing belt changed. 2 days ago, i got the starter bushing replaced, and the whole CDI replaced as well, coz there are many occasions that my car overheated, and the engine wont start. next, i bought a new pair of back bush, needed replacement too, so that my car wont sound like its going to disintegrate every time i hit a dip on the road. also, bought a new spark plug, cause everytime i started the engine, it seems like its goin 'shaky'. and also got new beltings, new bearings for the timing belt (i could have bought the full set, but i didnt know that at first) and also new starter rings.

when i finished shopping for parts, i went back to the 'overly friendly' band of trio 'malay' brothers who run the workshop. (the only reason i went to this particular 'trio brothers' workshop is that i can get cheaper human labor prices compared to the chinese workshop that my father suggested. i only have to smile a lot at them, making small talks, sits and sometimes walk around looking particularly interested in whatever they were doing, and look dumb and cute once in a while and act as if i got no brains inside my skull. then i got almost 50% off the usual rates.)

what can i say? they are men afterall. and i am just another damsel in distress, helpless with a car that almost died on me... :)

and no, this is not an exploitation of sexes. i am totally against using gender to gain the upper hand :))

urgh. im bored. im goin out.

later.

Kalau nak naikkan harga, naikkan jer la. Bangsat.

2010-02-05T20:22:00.001+08:00

If harga gula naik dipasaran antarabangsa, dan kerajaan harus naikkan harga gula, naikkan jer la. Yang lagi nak spekulasi sana sini tentang harga apa ke jadah? Macam haram. Sial tak sudah. Kalau nak naikkan harga, terus jer naikkan on the spot. Tak payah nak cakap harga gula naik lepas tahun Baru Cina ke, tahun baru Yahudi ke, tahun baru Bahai ke. Bodoh melantun. bangsat mcm haram. dasar yahudi. Arghh bengangnyer.

Bila wat spekulasi harga, pemborong akan tros ambil kesempatan. pemborong ke pengilang ke akan mula sorok barang. lagi tak paham ke? apa yg bodoh sgt ni? tak tahu ke betapa azabnya bila nak meniaga tp barang2 asas semua tak dijual?? sial sungguh. eh bodoh. kerja makan gaji buta ke? otak sorok kat bontot? yg pegi cakap harga gula naik lepas tahun baru cina, tp umum sebulan lebih awal apa ke jadah haramnye punya sial punya statement? ambik kau. bodoh wal bangsat wal celaka.

pegi mampus la.

dont let me go.. (2)

2010-02-02T19:08:00.000+08:00

bukan satu penyelesaian..

2010-02-02T19:01:00.000+08:00

i read this.

http://saifulislam.com/?p=7508

*sigh...*

should i?
should i not...?
am i supposed to..?
maybe i am not supposed to..
but what if it was meant to..?
but maybe it was not meant to..

perhaps.

don't let me go..

2010-02-01T19:04:00.000+08:00

never say never: the fray

There's some things we don't talk about
Rather do without
And just hold the smile
Falling in and out of love
Ashamed and proud of
Together all the while

You can never say never
Why we don't know when
Time and time again
Younger now than we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Picture you're the queen of everything
As far as the eye can see
Under your command
I will be your guardian
When all is crumbling
Steady your hand
You can never say never
Why we don't know when
Time, time and time again
Younger now then we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
We're pulling apart and coming together again and again
We're growing apart but we pull it together
Pull it together, together again

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go

Lindungilah dia..

2010-01-25T00:05:00.000+08:00

Semoga Allah melindungi sahabat kami, AdukaTaruna, dari segala kejahatan manusia-manusia dan dari kejahatan atas perbuatan dirinya sendiri.. Ameen..

-its been a long day. AT's blog is like being mob by a bunch of loonies. how did it come to this, i dont know. i mean, of course i know what lead to this, but, it was supposed to be another day of AT making a way over the top crude joke. but yeah, its too far already. but strange, i didnt feel anything. am i that desensitize that i felt nothing?

immortality

2010-01-21T17:56:00.000+08:00

what do stefan salvatore & william thomas compton have in common?

guess guess guess..

dont know? ok. lemme change the question.

what do stefan salvatore, william thomas compton & edward cullen have in common?

haha.

>>immortality. at least being vampires and stuff make them immortal.

i just got back from cari makan. im so tired, in fact, im so tired i cant make my self sleep! now thats the first time. i dont know why but i kinda like.. got hooked up with vampires show. tormented soul, being in love with someone who kinda oblivious to how u feel, just spoke volumes. real life is way too tough. finding comfort in supernatural stuff, albeit its fictional seems a nice way to de-supress.

since im bored, lets talk immortal.

vampire diaries

i got the first season. 10 episodes total then the shows is put on hiatus for another 8 weeks. so today, 21st January is THE DAY when the 11th episode is starting again.. woohooo i wont miss it for anything. (i mean, i WONT miss it, not even if today happen to be my wedding day.. :p). so vampire diaries is about two brothers, stefan & damon salvatore whom are both vampires. stefan is the good bro, and damon is the evil bro. (but, i think, damon has some goodness in him.. and damon is kinda cute.. :P)

true blood

now this one is kinda my favorite show. got two seasons all 24 episodes. its about bill compton, who is a 150 years old vampires, who falls for a waitress, sookie. sookie is a telepath, and her ability is sought after by eric northman, the chief vampires of Area 5 (shreveport, lousiana). in vampire world (at least in true blood, a vampire can 'own' a human, and no other vampire can touch another human that belong to another vampire.) in this case, sookie belongs to bill compton.

but, eric northman wants sookie too. its hard to hate eric because eric is sooooo darn gorgeous. tall, blonde and broad shoulder (altho, blonde is not my type), eric is so darn good looking, compared to bill compton, who is short, darker, and so old fashion. seriously guys, if u are so bored at home, i suggest you watch true blood. i mean, whomever read this entry, i'll be glad to burn the series into DVD and send it off to ya. this is an offer i made because i just love true blood. haha.

twilight, new moon

ah.. what more to say about these two? edward n bella.... :P

so, meh layan youtube plak. muahahahaha

this one is from vampire diaries

this one from true blood

just for fun.. eric northman :P

more expensive oil but cheaper cars?

2010-01-21T11:22:00.000+08:00

From May 1, the fuel will be pegged at RM3.90 per litre for RON97, while RON95 will increase to RM3.70 per litre. However, the prices of national-made vehicles will be lowered by at least 40%. For example, a full-spec family sedan Proton Persona 1.6litre engine will cost around RM23k excluding road tax and insurance. ...Import tax and excise duty will be revised to only 30%, from the current 200%. Imported vehicles such as the new Toyota Camry 2.4litre engine will cost around RM65k", he said.

got that from Topeng PErak's FB.

Please Please Ya Allah.. make the above true. I really in need of a new car. My old ones are almost dying on me. Please.. Please ya Allah...

I know this is selfish. wishing for cheaper car. but what the heck. me need car so badly. so the oil price is hiking again. so the price of all goods are going to skyrocket again. so everything else is going to be far more expensive.

but.

the price of all goods are going to increase anyway. even if the price of national made cars are stagnant (means bloody expensive), the price of common goods are going to hike anyway. so at least, whilst the price of other goods are going to be much more expensive, its a good thing that the price of car is coming down.

i know.. i know.. not everybody is going to buy cars the moment the price is slashed to 50% and imported cars are slashed about 30%. i know, gov is trying to divert the issue of oil price hike, common goods price hike, the rest of the rakyat will have to bear the price increase even those who dont want and cant afford new car.

but give me a break. this is one good thing that i've been dying to hear since few months. i mean, i REALLY need new car ok. full stop. if that makes me selfish, please dont hesitate to call me so. haha. if the price of pesona is only 23K, i can almost afford a 2nd hand Hilux Toyota. the price of all 2ndhand cars are going to plummet. I really need big car. 4WD. I need to venture out in the pedalaman area. I cant do much businees with a car which dies on me eveytime I need to go out.

*sigh*

.

2010-01-15T18:21:00.002+08:00

i miss you.

adrenaline rush

2010-01-09T15:21:00.000+08:00

I was watching True Blood just now. And tetiba, my youngest sister meluru masuk rumah and bagitahu ada sorang lelaki tengah hisap gam kat luar. What the fudge? My sister tanya napa tak angkat hp, she called like many times because she was scared of entering as the man was just outside the door. Then my sister told me yg that man tgh lepak tepi my car. Hisap gam tepi my car. Damn.All of a sudden I was so fudging angry. I nampak satu batang paip besi bersandar tepi tangga. Fine. Stupid drug addict wont leave, so its up to me to beat him good.

Armed with steel pipe, I went outside. Damn, the moron was sitting next to my car. I walked towards him and gripped the pipe hard. Looked him in the eye and put as much hatred as I can. If look can kill, he'd be dead by then. I lifted the pipe, pointed it straight at him..

"Keluar dari kawasan rumah ini sekarang juga.."

Haha. I havent even finished my sentence and he took off running. Scared shitless. Fudging moron. If he tried anything stupid, I'd beat his sorry ass to pulp. And I am not kidding. I've beaten people before, been in fights before and I am sure as hell gonna beat his ass if he had not leave our home. What an idiot. I hope he comes back so I can punch him right between the nose and give him a nice right hook up his rib.

I can still hear my heart beating so fast from the anger. The adrenaline rush. Lucky day for him. He wont be so lucky next time.

true blood

2010-01-04T20:44:00.000+08:00

I am so hooked up on this show. Enchanted. Mesmerized. I like all supernatural stuff. Like Heroes, Merlin, Twilight, Supernatural, etc. True blood is the new addition to my collection. I downloaded all seasons for Heroes and Merlin. Got Twilight already (both), and I wanted to download SuperNatural since I missed all episodes but I guess, I'll just buy the DVD for Supernatural. And oh, Prison Break. Though theres nothing supernatural about Prison Break, but PB is one of the most intelligent tv series ever made.

Since me got no HBO, so I downloaded all 2 seasons of True Blood. To be honest, the plot is just okay. But I love the whole idea of everlasting something. Fancy that. Haha. Real life is so boring. Supernatural stuff is so cool..

Last weekend I watched The Last of The Mohicans. I've heard about this film quite a long time ago, but there was this person who always say stuff like "macam the las mohiken".. I have to watch it, then only I can talk about it. Hehe. So yeah, I watch it, its plot is straight as an arrow. But the filmography was good, stunts are what to be expected during the 90s. And as I recalled, during the 90s, I am so into epic films like BraveHeart, and DragonHeart. haha. Dragon Heart is another supernatural film.. :P

Im bored, so I think I'll sleep first. I hope Bill Compton come and bite me in my sleep.. Hehe.

nur kasih revisited

2010-01-02T12:09:00.000+08:00

baru terjumpa this piece of note masa kemas2 folder. written like a month ago.

***************************************************************

7:41 PM

Tuesday 8/12/2009

Guess what. Im watching Nur Kasih at Hotel Tabung Haji. Jane made me choose this place, and what the heck, I dont mind anywhere. As long as it got WIFI. Guess what. This place DONT have WIFI. I mean, what kind of hotel that doesnt have WIFI. Cheap one? No. Hotel Tabung Haji is much more expensive than the average hotel, but, you can guess. Why is that anything that has Islamic label to it, always left a lot to be desired?? I mean, come on la.. Malas nak ulas.

Anyway, Im not in the mood to go out. Im so tired. Really tired. I woke up around 6 this morning, feeling woozy and wobbly, packed an overnight bag since I have to pick up Jane at the airport and tomorrow, I have to go and pick another sister, Ekin, at her school since she already finished her SPM exam.So that means, I have to spend a night in KK. Like a short holiday. Haha. As if.After checking into our room, we went out for lunch. And Jane went for her usual groceries shopping which consists of food and food and food.. As usual, I tag along to humor her. Guys, when your pregant wife wanted to go for shopping, just tag along like a good puppy okay. Dont ask question.

Since Im tired but Im not really sleepy, so I thought I'd just type my entry in a notepad and upload it later. Pathetic. I know. And maybe I'll watch New Moon again for the 5th times. Haha..

Anyway, Im not really watching Nur Kasih. Just thought that it would be cool to have Nur Kasih on telly like the rest of the world. Seems like its a normal thing to do. Watch Nur Kasih on TV3. I am not going to bash or dissin' the drama. But like most Malay drama, it has too much 'drama' and I just cannot stomach drama that got too much 'drama' in it.

I dont really know whats Nur Kasih is all about. All I know is this Adam is married to Nur, Nur got a sister, Sarah, which looks like a gedik (but of course, a nice gedik who wears tudung), whom is lusting over Aidil, which is Adam's brother, who actually like Aliya. And yeah, you can guess the story revolves around the dilemma of husband and wife, sister and sister, this person like this person, but this person dont like that person, coz he like the other person. blablabla. I dont have anything against this type of drama. I just cant stand the plot which drags on and on and on about same thing over and over again. Its.. Lame.

*Sigh..*

But tonight episode, one thing does caught my attention. Its kinda sweet actually. Its that scene where Adam wrote an email to Nur, but Nur doesnt reply, then Adam looks upset. But then, it seems that its not like Nur doesnt wanna reply, its just that, she dunno what to say. But, she keeps waiting in silence for Adam's email. She keeps going into her inbox but Adam didnt send her any email because apparently, Nur didnt reply his. It got Adam thingking that maybe, Nur doesnt like email and stuff. Which is kinda sad but sweet.

I wanted to tell the director that, they should make it more dramatic. Since its drama which got too much drama in it, lets just go overboard with the whole dramatic thing. Like, dont just use email. Make Adam and Nur communicate using GoogleTalk. Its better right since both of them are using Gmail. Then they can show how sad Nur face looks when Adams button is not green and 'Available'. Or how Adam sigh heavily when Nur's button is not green too and she is no where 'Available'.

Next time, to make it even more dramatic and sweeter than sweet, the director should show at least one scene where both of them are 'Available'. Then Nur status shud be change to "Rindu Abg Adam sgt2".. or Adam status should be changed to something like "Nur.. Abg rindu Nur.." And to get all young people to watch more Nur Kasih, to get high ratings for the drama, they shud show how these two lovebirds communicate long distance by chatting and GTalking, since long distance relationship has been made easier via superb technology and aircrafts..

*******************

On a happier note, What a crappy show. Nur Kasih is so crap. I mean, the only good character in the story was the 'gedik' sister of Nur. Now THAT my friend, represent the majority of those female population in Malaysia. They cover their hair, but inside, they are bunch of hypocrites. They think not twice of seducing a man. Ask me how do I know this? From personal experience. From the way these hair-covering type of female species who talk sweetly but has evil agenda beside all those sweetness. Poor male species. The other brain rules so much so that they failed to see these type of generic female for what they truly were. But kudos to whoever shot this film, the cinematography is good, better than the average drama. At least the cameraman bothered to shot at different angle. Lighting is good, it gives out the feeling of the drama.

Well yeah.. thats about it.

Hehe.

fire in the hole~~~

2010-01-01T18:41:00.001+08:00

selamat tahun baru masihi~~!!

kem 1: station 'first class' (sbb dapat main atas meja wpun duduk atas lantai)

2nd station- economy class (sbb kena duduk atas lantai). haha
untuk menjamin kelancaran tangan mengklik, tangan dan jari2 haruslah sering disapu losyen... ini juga untuk mengelakkan kulit dari kering dan merekah akibat bermain terlalu lama.. hihi

terrorist in action.. kitorang main network 5 orang.. ada 5 'mean machines'. of course, laptop den la yg paling power sbb baru beli. kah kah kah... (tp den la yg slalu mati awal.. haha)

yg depan skali nih adik ipar den. dia tgh bg sokongan moral kat wife dia yg tgh boyot 6 bulan tp sebok nak join main cs. last2 terpaksa den bg can kat adik ipar den nih main kat laptop den jugak. sok2 anak dia lahir2 mintak beli ni.. ngeee...

ramblings

2009-12-29T17:20:00.000+08:00

this is weird.
its getting really.. really weird.
but im not a weirdo.. (am i not?)
its like im living a double life.
on and off the screen.
heh.

of doors and windows..
they said if one door is closed, another is opened.
it may not be a door, maybe just a window.
fully open, or partially opened.

but..
do we wait for the something come knocking?
or do we brave it all and go take a look?
or maybe.
sneak thru the window.
peep thru the key hole.
anything.
just to get to know 'the other side'.

cheers.

"brilliant, are we not?"

2009-12-27T21:26:00.000+08:00

ada org tu ckp...

"korang mmg have a briliant brain"

"susah nak jumpe spesis mcm korang nih"

thanks. my adek bongsu ari tuh dpt result pmr, 8A. so she insisted on having bbq. kitorang dah agak malas nak bbq kalau dpt results gempak2 nih.. coz, lets just face it. we all get 8A for pmr, and almost everybody score 10A utk spm. so takat nak dapat straight A nih, tak heran lah. it runs in the family.. haha..

thanks Allah for the gift. coz i dont think we all really study that much, but due to His guidance, somehow, its easy to get thru. personally, i dont even remember study that much, masa zaman skolah2 dulu, slalu stay up late at night, tp bukan study.. sebok main signal2 radio ngan teman2 lelaki jaman muda2. kah kah kah..

so yeah.. dats about it.

cheers.

perfect

2009-12-27T19:34:00.000+08:00

im imperfect. i guess we all are. its quite an understatement, really.. its like saying the sky is blue when really, there isnt a cloud in sight. hehe

dats why when i like ~~someone~~ something, or even when anyone ask questions like "what do you think about etc etc...", i tend to say.. 'i like it, its perfect'. when i like something, first word of description that comes to my mind is..

..perfect.

so, even when i feel like shit, when people asked me how im doing, i'll just say..

"im perfect"

dandy eh?

:P

"we come to love not by finding the perfect person..

but by learning to see an imperfect person.. perfectly."

happy new year folks

2009-12-18T11:06:00.000+08:00

im not those kind of people who got a list of what they are going to do come new year. new year or not, its same ol same ol. just taking it easy day by day. of course, yesterday i thought i might be doing something today, it turns out, i need a change of plan. same thing goes for everything else. some ppl had it worst, but as far as i can see, i had it on the 'average'..

reflection.

on the contrary, i tend to reflect a lot. tendency to 'over think' every single little thing. slight tendency of oevrthinking, which always, and most of the time, doesnt serve my best interest. tendency to.. sit and brood, sit and think, and dwell on lots of thing. suffice to say, thinking has become an obsession. if i were to slice open my brain right now, u'd probably see a maze of interconnected super highway, overlapping itself so much its probably doesnt make any sense. haha.

so perhaps, this new year, i might use less brain, and definitely, less emotion, yes? gaaaahh. its like asking to chop one hand off. its who we are, if we change what we are, then, do we really know who we are anymore? if we change what we dont like about ourself, but those that we like, is kinda what define us, then who are we? see, there goes the start of a veryyy long thinking process... :P

so folks, whatever stage in life you are...

be content with what you have,
love whats good for you,
be nice to each other,
decide whats best for you,
and stick to it.

have a great year!

pesanan kakmot: salam maaf hijrah 1431. islam didahulukan, syariat diutamakan!

slight reminder

2009-12-17T07:38:00.000+08:00

for myself mostly..

keep true...
never be ashamed of doing whats right..
decide on what you think is right..
and stick to it. (ts eliot)

i always wondered whether things that i do and did, things that i choose and decide for myself and others, are they the right ones? there are things that i really do not enjoy in life..

shopping.
traffic.
making decision.

gaaaahh. i usually cant make up my mind on many things. the undecisive me. so it goes without saying that, given time and space, mostly,i avoid from making decision. decision which required me to say yes or no. gaaahhh if i can, i avoid it. totally.

but, i value myself, as a 'man of principle'. principle based, i stick to it. no matter what.

what am i saying anyway?

ha ha ha.

good night.. (or shud i say, good friggin morning folks).

flightless bird

2009-12-15T11:53:00.000+08:00

hurmm.. just wanna share this one beautiful song from twilight. im kinda disspointed with new moon twilight (the movie was good, tho my dispointment came only from expecting too much.) new moon soundtracks really stinks. i cant really 'connect' to any of the song. so im reverting back to listening to twilight ost. tho twilight movie was slightly less desirable than newmoon, the ost kinda make up for all its weaker points.

********************************

this one song makes me want to go n sit alone at some far far away beach and just sit doing nothing.. id be bold and go so far as calling this song 'quite romantic'. when i listen to it, it kinda makes me wanna smile and ~~fall in love~~ dance slowly.

Balik kampong

2009-12-12T09:29:00.001+08:00

Will be going back to my kampong today. Actually I just arrived here in Kudat last Thursday, coz I need to pick up some claims and some stuffs and also need to do a favor for this one cikgu who called me and screaming about how she don't know a single thing about her assignment on Management Science. So I have to drive all the way from my kampong just to see her and gather all materials and stuffs so that she finally can go to sleep without worrying about a single thing. Im in a tight situation as it is cause looking at all these questions, I have no idea where to start. But I feel so sorry for her cause she got like small kids and they are supposed to go for a holiday.

Gaaaaahhhhhh. Why cant I just say "No, Im sorry but I really dont know how to do this, plus I got tons of work to do too, and this is holiday so I also deserve a good holiday."

*Sigh..*

I'd be cracking my brain again.

Takziah

2009-12-12T08:45:00.000+08:00

Pengantin Baru Antara Empat Terbunuh Dalam Kemalangan

Got msg from Ustaz kat ym memberitahu seorang ikhwah ex-nottingham sheffield meninggal dunia dalam satu kemalangan. Mohd Ariff Abdul Kadir seorang yg gigih dan banyak bekerja untuk kerja2 dakwah dibumi UK. Sgt menyedihkan sbb baru empat jam melafaz akad nikah, sudah dijemput Pencipta. Teringat kisah Handzalah bin Abi Amir r.a yg syahid dimedan perang dalam keadaan masih berjunub sebab tak sempat mandi hadas kerana tergesa-gesa menyahut panggilan Perang Uhud. Mendapat penghormatan yang tinggi saat mayatnya dimandikan para malaikat. Subhanallah.. Semoga Afifa sabar dengan ujian ini.

Tak kenal pun Allahyarham mahupun isterinya, but I feel so sad for both of them especially the wife. Hope she'd be strong for this. To lose someone you love, someone who you'd suppose to spend the rest of your life with, someone who'd you should be building your life and your future, is unimaginable. Unthinkable. God, it was awful..

Semoga Allah memberi kekuatan pada Afifa, dan semoga Allahyarham tenang bersemadi disana.. Ameen.

road trip

2009-12-11T10:30:00.000+08:00

start journey. awal sgt, lapar la plak. stop jap kat gerai tgh hutan beli pisang dr org kampong. hehe.

road challenge. wish this car has a sunroof. leh wat aksi ala2 tony jaa. haha. this is dangerous, dont try this on ur own. hehe.

future pet projek. bisnes trip to pusat pembenihan ikan patin dan talapia @ bro jefrey, penampang.

penternakan ikan dibuat dlm kolam kanvas. cool. mudah dijaga dan diuruskan. handy even. bro nih siap bg penerangan cara2 penjagaan kolam kanvas and sistem penggredan ikan2. at first i thot dia ternak lintah. pikey lapan juta kali nak dekat ngan pondok dia nih. just in case lintah tu tak brekfas lg kan. rupanya yg dlm kanvas ni ikan.. hahahaha..

singgah kedai ikan. sbnrnya nih pet shop. mcm2 jual. hamster, stuart little, kekura, kucing etc. singgah nak beli rabbit sbnrnya for my sis. tapi seronok tgk ikan2 nih. hehehe

Lesson in disguise

2009-12-11T09:49:00.000+08:00

Some love stories aren't epic novel..

Some are short stories..

But it doesn't make them any less filled with love.

Carrie Bradshaw, Sex & The City

wordplay

2009-12-10T21:01:00.000+08:00

tired.
jetlag.
toasted.
mind-boggled.
wrecked.
sleepy.
raging.
headache.

goodnight.

The idiocy of Romeo N Juliet.

2009-12-10T20:45:00.000+08:00

O, here

Will I set up my everlasting rest,

And shake the yoke of inauspicious stars

From this world-wearied flesh.

Eyes, look your last..

Arms, take your last embrace.. and, lips, O you

The doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss

A dateless bargain to engrossing death..

By Edward Cullen, from Shakespeare class.

Now we are talking!

2009-12-08T02:37:00.000+08:00

I slept early last nite, actually, been sleeping early, and for some awful reason, I always 'bangun secara mengejut' around 12am to 1am. It has been like this for months. I have no idea why. So like usual, here I am, lounging around in my bed, surfing aimlessly for stuff to laugh about. Hehe. In case you havent notice, I always love reading funny stuff. This one blog entry caught my attention. It was so deliriously funny and honest, and I just HAVE TO share it with you. but, for all due respect, it contains reading hazard for men.

Title: Got Boobs? Instant Hotties?
Taken from: http://obefiend.blogspot.com/

Boobs are like beer googles for ugly chicks?

I’m an ass and leg man. I like boobs too but to me boobs are extremely overrated. Sometimes men got blinded by those big hooters they fail to realise that the chick that they considers hot are actually not that hot.

Let’s do a rundown of supposedly hot babes in the entertainment business shall we. These pictures are edited so that their prized asset won’t be a distraction. Now men, be honest and tell me if these chicks still look hot without their humongous mammary glands.

I personally think Blake Lively is unbelievably horse face. I think when Sarah Jessica Parker eventually retires Blake could take her place as the horse of Hollywoodland. HA HA.

So why the obsession with boobs? I remember my first encounter with a pair boobs. I was around 8-10 at the time. I was watching an Indon horror movie tape we found in my uncle’s room. The title was Pontianak Berdarah or something. Me and my cousins found it under his wardrobe while we were in my nenek’s house. So we loaded the tape into his tape machine. The movie started with a wedding scene. Judging by the costume it was a traditional Javanese wedding. After the akad nikah the scene moved to the bedroom. I was an innocent lad back then so we suspected nothing weird will happen. Next thing we knew the newlyweds are naked and I saw my first pair of boobies! They were perky and B cup. They are actually pretty cute I must say. Then the scene got fucked up. The husband was actually a black magic practitioner and he rips those cute boobs from his wife’s chest like Mortal Kombat. Blood were now gushing from what’s left of her boobs. We screamed because we never saw anything quite as WTF as that before. All the uncles and auntie came running to see what’s the big ruckus was all about. We pointed to the telly and were met with silence. HAHAHA.

Suffice to say my uncles no longer kept his VHS under the wardrobe after that and I was traumatised by boobs. LOL

So why am I not a boob man? As I said boobs are overrated. What really attracted me to girls are

•Husky voice

•Ass

Husky voice is the most underrated sexiness factor ever. When I told Mrs Weiland I have a crush on Julia Stiles she looked at me like I was retarded. I have to explain to her why I like Miss Stiles so much. Her voice is fucking husky as hell. I love them!

“Bie.... your taste in women suck. She is ugly and manly.Now you make me feel like I am one of those sucky women!”

LOL. Then I have to pujuk her for 10 minutes or so. In case you are wondering Mrs Weiland voice is husky and sexy as hell. When we first got to know each other we talked through Yahoo Messenger. Then she called me one fine day and I knew then she is someone that I want to make babies with. You can tell a lot from the voice and how they speak to you. I can’t stand girls who speak manja-manja and talks like a baby

“Bibieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......... I missssssh u shangatttttttt”

My penis literally shrinks back into my nut sack each time I hear a girl speaks like that. Oh I dated a couple of those too. It didn’t last long thank god! I can’t imagine marrying someone who talks like that. Can you imagine all the inane conversation in between sex? HAHAHAHHA

As for the ass? I can’t explain this but I just love a good ass on a women. But I do remember asking my mom why when whistles when they saw a curvy women. If you watch 80’s Malay movies they must have at least one scene where the actor wolf whistles a female and then they make the body shape signal with their hands. My mom told me;

“Bila kamu dah besar kamu tau la nanti”

I dah besar now and still I have no answer why I like curvy women. They are just sexier I think. Speaking about no real logical answer, I often asked Mrs Weiland why she needs to go to 17 shoe shops to look or shoes and we ALWAYS end up at the first shop where she eventually tried the first shoe anyway! RAGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
So anyway most people think the obsession with boobs is the exclusive domain of the men. This is not true. I think women are equally obsessive with boobs. They stuff Kleenex inside their cup to make their boobs bigger. They wore tank tops to flaunt them. Even chicks with no boobs use the “Myspace Camera Angle (tm)” to fake their nonexistent cleavage. There are even videos on YouTube on how to create a fake cleavage using make up. From now on please stop accusing us men of being obsessive with boobs.
Oh....... just before we go. There is another reason why I don’t go out and look for girls with big boobs. If you marry a small boobed chick, you can always "enhance" her later. But if you marry someone with squeaky voice and no ass.......... there is no medical procedure to remedy this deficiency! LOL!

I love Mrs Weiland.........(ayat penyelamat just in case she rotan me again)

p/s : Hey, it's a start, right? The goal, of course, is to be like you - the Daywalker! You got the best of both worlds, don't you? All our strengths... none of our weaknesses.

My comment: I agreed like 150% with this writer. First, the part where he hated squeaky-voice chicks. OOooh I hate those type of girls. I dont make friends with those gedik types. Those manja2 types who SQUEAK their voice when they talk to anyone.

"weyyhhh koranggsss joms larrrr gi shoppinggg beshhhhh shangattt kat sanerr aderr shellll"
"Heyy sayangg,, I misshhh youuuuu shangat-shangatt.. bilerr you nakk datangggg.. Missshhhh youuuuu"

ok I dont really know how to imitate or tiru-tiru gaya gediks nih. I usually saw that they talked like that on telly. I bet the KL metro type girls talk like that. Im a kampong girl, so I dont really know. I hate those girls who talk as if they got they brains stuck forever right at their skinny ass. I hate talking bout shoes. Bout fashion. Bout make ups. I dont even like shopping. I mean, come on la. Is it not enough that you already wear all the branded stuff, you have to continously talk about it? I loved good pair of branded, expensive jeans, but I dont go around talking about fashion all the chances I got. Nak sgt guys attention that you have to talk gediks, talk manja2. Its not sexy. Suddenly I feel like cursing. And not suprising at all, I dont have friends like this. Period. I just couldnt stand gediks people who flaunt their body, talk like a retard, just to get the male attention. Gaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh. &(7(&*(&*^&*6868q7wq8wq.

Next, bout this curvy thingy. Haha. Okayyy this is so sensitive as I happened to 'evolve' into one. Two nights ago, for some sad reason, there is this one guy who kept saying he is becoming a 'fat' person. He kept comparing his figure when he was younger and he kept complaining bout his gaining weight and becoming fat. I dont really know why he kept bringing that up. I think it was suffice to say that, he wanted me to know that, I too, am 'fat'??

*Sigh....*

Never mind.

I think, being intelligent is sexy. Being curvy as hell doesnt hurt either. Haha. (Okay, boobs may help too, but it can steer the direction of even the most intelligent conversation, HAHAHA, but a nice pair of ass, male species doesnt know what hit him. LOL) If I were to choose, I'd go for the short, itam legam, bald, fat guy but who is damn smart RATHER than the tall, muscled, 6packs who talks only sports, car, his own body, and talks money all the time. Gaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!

And it just occur to me, why do girls tend to say stuff like..

"sayangg... i rindu u shangat-sshangattt... "

when,

"miss u so damn much.."

....says it all?

Haha.

I guess, Im just different. Not normal. The terminal barchelorette. I guess being aloof, cold, not gediks, is not in the market at the moment. Being skinny like typical TV and film actor and actress is what most people especially men go after these days.

Well, cant be bothered.

Cheers.

a moment in time

2009-12-08T02:18:00.002+08:00

miss you..
so damn much.

.............

Warming up

2009-12-07T10:50:00.001+08:00

I.Am.Just.So.Lazy.

Haha.. i thought when i bought a new laptop, and throw away the old one, I'd be all fired up to blog and to write and to read more. Gain new skills like do more tricks on photoshop or illustrator or bloggertricks and whatnots. Learn new stuff. Read and read more. Coz I havent been reading any academic stuff lately. The last book I read was by Stephen Hawking. The theory of everything. which is like a month ago. The book consist of 7 lectures oh how the earth begin and blablabla. Im only in my second lectures, and I put the book down, and there you go, Im just lazy.

Haha.

So this is a warm up entry, so to speak...

I bought this new, cheap, affordable laptop from Cycom@Lowyatt. Actually, I browse through lowyat forum and checkout all the priceguide. I just selected and model, call them to get the laptop set ready, wired the money to my sister, and give her the address of the shop, and she went there to pick up for me. Easy peachy. The new way to shop, again.. so to speak. For someone like me who hates shopping, the whole process is just great. Convenient. Heh.

Check out the latest price guide for most of your computer, and laptop and IT accesories needs here at hardwarezone.

I bought a Compaq CQ40 627TU @ RM1600. But actually, it was advertised as RM1799.

Haha.. The advantages of having a certified psychologist to do your shopping is that, my sister can bargain, negotiate, and manipulate anyone she comes across with. She is charming to a point where, she can get almost Rm200 discount from a Chinese shop. Way to go sister!! And the funny part was, dah la dapat diskaun, she insisted on getting all the free gifts. There was this one amazing storiy about my sister where an Air Asia flight, actually waited for her to board. I'll write about it maybe later. Hehe.

So anyway, this laptop works fine. Freedos and everything. So all i needed was to install and Operating System, which, to be honest, I kinds sucks with all these. Not to mention the first CD Vista that my sister bought for me was malfunction. Not bootable at all. So it wasnt my fault that I didnt really know this stuff, it was the CD fault. Haha.

Anyway, I installed Windows 7 Ultimate Edition, and it works superbly. Its kinda light and perform as promised, a far cry from my previous Acer Aspire One (the small mini laptop, runs on Intel Atom N270) which really stinks to high heaven. That will be my last association with any Acer products. People, DO NOT BUY ACER PRODUCTS. Period.

I ran a Window Experience Index Assessment test to see how my machine performs after I fully installed all the programs and stuffs. I already isntalled the ADOBE CS4 Master Collections, Microsoft Office, games and stuffs. Surprisingly, it took less than 20seconds to boot, and its really fast. No more waiting while the windows load during start up.

Check out my performance index.

Base score is determined by the lowest subscore. It indicates that my graphics are not really powerful. It was 3.3 before I installed all the Warcraft and Dota games, and not it was down to 2.9. Next time, I'll go and upgrade my graphic card.. (is that the correct term?)

Overall, I'm quite impressed with Win7. I dontreally like Vista interface, and Win7 is very much like Vista, but what the heck, as long as it performs, Im okay with that. Of course there was some compatibility issue. For example, my Yahoo Messenger keep crashing after few minutes. Havent quite figured out why, but maybe compatibility? Dunno.

And, I can't connect to other Wireless LAN that was running on Vista or XP servers. My sisters and my bro are playing Warcraft on network LAN, and I keep trying to connect to their server but windows just refused to do any connection.

So what I did instead was, I setup my laptop as the primary server using the ad hoc LAN connection, and get them to connect with me, AND IT WORKS.

So people, next time you have problem to do LAN thing with other servers running on XP or Vista, fret not. Just create new ad-hoc connectiona nd have them connect to you instead.

Thats all folks.

Im all warmed up now.

Think I might get some sleep though..

:P :P

Tragedi Bot Karam di Perairan Pulau Banggi - Kudat

2009-11-28T23:19:00.001+08:00

Berita dari MStar

Hasrat Keluarga Berhari Raya Di Pulau Banggi Tidak Kesampaian

KUDAT: Hasrat sebuah keluarga merayakan Hari Raya Aidiladha di Pulau Banggi tidak kesampaian ekoran tragedi bot karam dekat sini petang semalam.

Salah seorang penumpang yang terselamat Yahya Othman, 61, berasal dari pulau berkenaan, berkata berikutan pembangunan pesat di pulau itu, keluarga isterinya dari Papar teringin untuk melawat Pulau Banggi dan memilih untuk beristirehat pada cuti umum Hari Raya Aidiladha di sana.

"Saya mahu membatalkan perjalanan ke Pulau Banggi kerana terlalu ramai yang mahu datang.

Lagi berita disini.

Baru sebentar tadi my sister kecoh sbb heboh satu kampus yang kawannya antara mangsa lemas bot karam di perairan Pulau Banggi - Kudat. Norhamisah Raihana Yahya, anak kepada Yahya Othman dan juga ibu kepada Raihana masih lagi dilaporkan hilang. Ayah kepada Raihana, Pakcik Yahya dilaporkan selamat.. Usaha mencari dan menyelamat masih lagi diteruskan. Tapi cuaca di Kudat pada masa sekarang nih memang sentiasa hujan dan angin kencang.

Semoga Allah memelihara Raihana dan ibunya serta mangsa-mangsa yang masih belum ditemui.. Ameen.

dancing mania: layan hindustan

2009-11-28T15:17:00.000+08:00

my bro yg baju putih selendang krim, first sekali keluar belah kiri. partner dia mmg org india..

cayalah bro~! semangat bagai.. we are so proud of you!

dancing mania!

2009-11-28T14:25:00.001+08:00

Musim cuti nih, semua adik beradik balik, kecuali c atik yang g bangkok atas urusan kerja. jane plak g labuan temankan asben dia yg tak dapat cuti raya haji. so, kat rumah tinggal 7 org jek. yg keje kl pon seme ada kat umah. so, bese kalau kumpul2 camnih, kitorang slalu plan indoor activities jek. malas nak kuar. mmg genetik kitorang kot malas nk kuar rumah nih. haha..

so, smlm kitorang plan, siang nih nak men step mania guna dance pads, and petang kang, tournament counter strike condition zero and counter strike source. pastuh, nak pulun half life 2 sekali. err.. agak pelik jugak bila sumer dah besar panjang nih baru sebok nak men game. hihi.. sbb masa kecik2, mana leh men game. bapak marah woo.. masa kecik2, sekolah kene study.. ahaks.. so bila dah besar panjang nih, dah masing2 reti beli laptop sendirik, sendirik dah ada duwet, bapak dah tak leh marah2 kalu siang malam tak tido ngadap laptop men game ke men fesbuk ke... kah kah kah... :p

step mania dancing pads

nih adik yg lelaki tgh pulun nari atas dance pad nih. haha.. dia nih masih study kat international school. tp hobi masa lapang dia adalah menari. sumer jenis tarian dia suka, dr hiphop, syapel, zapin, hindustan seme dia reti.. kira kat kolej, dia mmg ngetop abis la bab menari nih..

gamba the girls tak leh upload, coz pakaian tak ikut protokol majlis... ngeee...

nak tahu pasal step mania nih ada kat http://www.stepmania.com/

yg dance pads tu guna thin foam pad connect pakai usb, model 'ignition'. check it out here.

*********************

meriahnya bila cuti2 dapat kumpul ramai2...

my sisters@fesbuk...

tak sabar nya petang nih nak men cs. sat gi nak setup wireless LAN. nih my bro la yg reti network2 nih. c ena kuar g bandar tgh mencarik cd cs n half life sbb yg download smlm, tak leh run. haha...

btw, my laptop baru dah sampai. tapi tak reti nak install OS lagi.. :( dia keep kuar IDE ATAPI cannot be found. sedih siot.. my new laptop model compaq CQ40 627TU. sesapa ada kepakaran atau reti, leh la gitau camner nak install OS nih..

Seputar Raya Haji

2009-11-28T11:50:00.000+08:00

nih hadiah yg diterima pada 21.10.2009. org lain punya besday, den plak yg dapat adiah. ahaks :p
(saje jek.. nanti org tu ingat den dah lupa lak adiah dia nih.. :p)

upacara membuli kazen2 den yg ensem neh tok gergaji buluh n kopek kelapa. muahahaha... :p

upahnya, dpt makan free n buleh jadik geng ronda2 keliling kampong.. :p

yg atas nih gambo masa raja aidil fitri. tp raya nih buat jugak 'pulut tumbuk' neh. makanan tradisi indo.

tiap2 tahun wajib ada nih.. keje dia amat leceh sekali tp best buat keje bejemaah camnih. i like~~ :p

huh.. tere tak den wat ketupat. haha.. bab ngisi nih la kene pakar. kalau tak, ketupat jadik lembiks. takpon jadik separa matang.. :p

yg sebelah tu buluh lemang. tp tah gi mana gambo kitorang tgh isi lemang berjemaah. tp lemang korban kali ini kitorang modify sket. selalu lemang tu kitorang tros bakar. tp tawon ni, utk menjimatkan masa dan tenaga, lemang tu direbus terlebih dahulu. senang jek. isi lemang ngan santan dia cam bese. pastuh susun lemang tu dlm tin minyak yg segiempat. penah tgk tak minyak masak dlm tin segiempat. rebus dlm tu smpi agak2 80% masak. pastu bakar la cam bese. haha.. tak tahu la kalau cara nih org dah ebse buat. tp kitorang baru fes taim nak coba. tgk rupa lemang tu, cam ok jek. rasa, tak tahu. sbb den nih jenis tak makan pulut. perut den yg lemah gemalai nih sensitif kalau makan jenis2 pulut nih. mau sembelit berhari2. hahaha...

Selamat Menyambut Raya Qurban

2009-11-27T04:35:00.000+08:00

Hari ni letih sungguh. Siap gi kebun sepupu kutip kelapa, pastuh tunggu dia kopek kelapa tu n gergaji buluh2 nak buat lemang. Pastu mula balik projek masakan tradisi 1Malaysia kat umah ni. Haha... nanti2 la kita sambung gebang lg. Ngantok ya amat nih..

Selamat Menyambut Raya..

Better in time..

2009-11-22T23:27:00.001+08:00

I cant really be bothered to write anything recently. AT suh write something in English, for his blog, just couldnt work out the appetite to care about whats going on lately. Indifferent. Cant be bothered. For now at least.

Somtimes, there comes a moment in time, where you ahve to choose. Sometimes, life choose it for you. So most of the time, it wasnt really about choices you have to make. Coz deep down, you already know what you supposed to do. Just that, you hesitate. Keep lingering, hoping that, you dont have to face it. Hoping that, if you pretend like if it wasnt there, then, it wasnt real. Coz deep down, it just... wont do.

I got this friend. She really like this one guy, but it was so obvious, there is just something not right. Like 'unfinish business' between them. So try as she might, it left her, 'clueless'. So she thought, these phase has got to come to an end. Like always, good things always come to and end.

Afterall, if good things do not come to an end, how are you supposed to know that what you have was good? Only after it ends, then you know it was good, because soon after it ends, it left a bitter taste. Everything just doesnt feel the way it was.

So my friend thought, altho she likes this one guy so much, it just wont do to linger around. Distance is good, or so she thought. Which was dumb really, coz how are you supposed to stay away from someone you like? Maybe she'll be fine without him.

Maybe.

i just haven't met you yet...

2009-11-19T11:52:00.002+08:00

sexy guy, sexy song, sexy voice..

:p
the almost-perferct-song..

Wherever you are..
Whenever its right..
You'll come out of nowhere..
And into my life..

Escapism

2009-11-19T11:15:00.001+08:00

huh.. takder laptop mmg sgt melemahkan minda.
balik umah, tros blur. nak wat per agaknya?
so tadi, kol 10 dah siap keja, tros balik umah. masuk parking kat umah, wondering, hari ni nak watper agaknya?
arghh.. dunno what am i suppose to do. sit around?

last night the whole afternoon n night spent on reading.
5th Horseman by James Patterson. alah, the guy who wrote Maximum Ride. tak tahu Maximum Ride? Yang drama thriller action 'dark angel'. yup, yg ada jessica alba yg cun melecun tuh. tak tahu gak? then its your loss. click sini kalau nak tahu pasal maximum ride. citer Dark Angel tu mirip adaptasi Maximum Ride by James Patterson. ada bnyk siri maximum ride nih. sila google sendirik. haha..

btw, baru 5 minit duk rumah, i am already restless. tgk luar, the sky spits rain. been raining since last nite. *sigh*.. what am i going to do? sleep? dont think so. bukak lemari, pick up the first clothes i can reach, cepat2 tukar baju, amik kunci keta.. and zoom for the door.

"HAA.. lin. nak gi mana lagi hujan2 nih?"
"err.. nak kuar kejap mak.."
"kau nih, kalau dah cuti sekolah tak boleh ke duduk rumah. kau kuar subuh buta dah malam baru nak balik. kalau dah cuti sekolah mcm nih, belajar2 la duduk rumah.."
"kejap jah mak... nak gi tgk laptop kat kedai..."
"semalam pon kau kata kejap. mak tunggu suh kau beli sayur, bapak kau dah siap makan baru kau sampai umah."
"........."
"elok2 bawak keta. ujan nih.."

*sigh...*

just my luck.

btw, sib baik mak tak suh beli sayur lg ari nih. coz im not really planning on going home dat early..
:p

notti notti me...

If I were a boy..

2009-11-18T12:24:00.001+08:00

I listened to this song in my car,

On my way here,

And it struck a chord...

I'd listen to her

'Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
'Cause he's taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it's broken
So they'd think that I was sleeping alone

I'd put myself first
And make the rules as I go
'Cause I know that she'd be faithful
Waiting for me to come home, to come home

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man

Saje buang masa.

2009-11-16T12:09:00.002+08:00

Kinda busy at the moment.

Nak update blog sendirik pon tarak masa.

Otak dah sangat serabut.

Haha.

Tuh sajer.

:p

Thank you for smoking.

2009-11-03T18:01:00.004+08:00

This is a movie that will challenge your conscience, your willpower, your dignity, your way of thinking, and of course, everything that you stood up for. It challenge your principal, and your priority in life.What is more important? Your personal view, or, how the rest of the world thinks? What if, you stood up for something that you, yourself never believed in? Is it just to pay for your mortgage? Or, is there something more than meet the eyes?

Beware: Suitable for viewing only for those who can think critically.

Name: Nick Naylor
Job: Lobbyist for Academy of Tobacco Studies
Jod description: To promote smoking and to design marketing strategies to bring more profit for the ciggarette companies.

Synopsis: Nick is a lobbyist, who befriended two other more people whose job is to promote things like alcohol and guns to the public. They called themselves 'The MOD Squad', i.e The Merchant of Deaths. Meaning, they know they job is actually asking people to slowly dies, but hey, its just the way of the world. You'll see how Nick, whose talent is talking, use his talent, to 'hide the secret and spin the truth'. Ultimately, Nick has to testify to the congress to pass a bill whether to put a skull image at the cigarette box label as a reminder to the public about the danger of smoking. See how Nick 'skillfully' and 'beautifully' spin the truth to make people believe in him.

Its.. just.. mind blowing..

This movie was referred by someone dear. It teaches you how to win an argument, and how to negotiate effectively. And also, the power of persuasion.

People, I bring to you..

You can start watching Part 1 here.

Warning: Contains explicit language and sexual scene.

Have a nice day..

:)

Iklan AirAsia yang bangang

2009-11-01T20:40:00.000+08:00

There are couple of things that I cannot tolerate in life. Among those are exploitation and manipulation in any form. Worst, if its done to benefit and making profit for some mega company. And worst of all, if it exploits women and children. Children especially. Fuxing capitalist.

I saw this Air Asia commercial on tv. It started of with a funny letter sent by a boy, read by his father about his journey. Then, the boy told us about his journey.

Watch this clip carefully.

The commercial was meant to be funny. In a way. But wasnt so funny for me.

Freeze at minute 0:28. What does that tell you? A boy looking at some stewardess ass, and thought it was nothing, and act innocent? What are the fuxing message are they sending to kids out there?

That its okay to look at older women tight ass, but please, act innocent and naive at the same time so you dont get caught? What the fux is that mean??

I had enuff of these capitalist moron.

And later, while already acting innocent while looking at some women ass, the boy was seen hugging a stewardess, so "innocently".. ****.

Oh yeah, dont forget, he also shot a picture of the stewardess ass. Nice shot by the way.

What happened to our country?
What happened to our culture?
Why are we watching a commercial so full of sexual innuendo, designed to attract and bring in more profits, but at the same time, exploiting our kids.

This is children we are talking about.

There are only four letter word for this.

****.

GETTING AWAY WITH MURDER! (Senarai pembunuhan misteri 1Malaysia)

2009-10-30T12:30:00.000+08:00

..and here i am idling away, enjoying the nice view, nice music, nice breakfast, while blog-hopping in the largest shopping mall in Borneo (which, has got so many shops in it, my feet sure got blistered if I ever attempt to walk around this mall. which I did not even considered, as I've been here like gazillion times and it was never for shopping, its always to watch movies). but here alone, I'm just gonna be killing some time before my appointment which is postponed because Jack has gtg to a hearing in court. *sigh..*

From RockyBru's blog, he quoted a sensational article from The Asia Sentinel on "Getting Away With Murder In Malaysia".

(Tak pernah lagi ada artikel daripada media bebas yang sebenari Asia Sentinel~!! Way to go forward with alternative,freedom mass media!)

oookay, den tak mo copy paste banyak2 kes yang dipaparkan dalam Asia Sentinel. Instead, den akan listkan highlights kes-kes pembunuhan misteri (or not so mystery) yang berlaku di negara 1Malaysia.

Kes 1: Teoh Beng Hock

On July 16, according to the testimony of a Thai pathologist, Teoh Beng Hock, a 29-year-old aide to an opposition politician, was probably beaten during a marathon questioning session, sodomized, strangled unconscious, dragged to a window of the Malaysia Anti-Corruption Commission in Kuala Lumpur and thrown to his death.

-menurut Thai Pathologist yang glemer tu, TBH mungkin kena belasah, kena sodom, kena cekik sebelum di campak keluar dari tingkap. Scary i tell you.....

Kes 2: Altantuyaa Sharibu

Altantuya Shaariibuu, a 28 year-old Mongolian translator who was murdered in 2006 by two bodyguards of then-Deputy Prime Minister Najib Tun Razak. Altantuya had been jilted by Najib's best friend, Abdul Razak Baginda, and was demanding money from him.

-translasi: wpun bnyk sumber mengaitkan Najib dengan Altantya, Najib tak pernah dipanggil utk memberi keterangan. 2 orang yang disabitkan dengan tuduhan membunuh Altantuya, salah seorang mengakut menerima bayaran RM100K, namun, mahkamah tidak pernah menimbulkan soal SIAPA yang membayar wang tersebut. and also, sebarang pengakuan tentang siapa yang memberi duit itu tidak dibenarkan didalam mahkamah. I mean, what the fudge??

Kes 3: Sultan Mahmud Iskandar of Johor a.k.a The Killer Ring

Sultan Mahmud Iskandar of Johor was dubbed the "killer king" by the British tabloids after he shot a trespasser to death on his property. He also reportedly assaulted and killed a golf caddy who was said to have laughed when the sultan missed a golf stroke and he maimed the caddy's brother. He later was alleged to have assaulted and injured a hockey coach, kicking off a constitutional crisis that led to former Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad's removal of legal immunity from prosecution for all of Malaysia's nine sultans, although Iskandar was never either arrested or jailed.

Pergh.. mcm citer The Don pun ada. Haha.. Sultan dikatakan menembak seorang yang masuk ke kawasan beliau. Diberitakan pernah menyerang dan membunuh golf caddy sbb caddy tu gelakkan dia masa stroke tak masuk. The Sultan tak pernah ditangkap atau dipenjarakan. What the fudge??

Kes 4: Mustakizah Jaafar

There are plenty more. In 1988 an attractive young woman named Mustakizah Jaafar, who owned a video rental business in Malacca, was found hacked to death by unknown assailants. Mustakizah reportedly was pregnant at the time of her death. She was believed to be having an affair with Megat Junid Megat Ayob, the onetime UMNO deputy home affairs minister, who died in January 2008 of cancer.

-Mustakizah yang sedang mengandung, dibunuh oleh pembunuh tak diketahui siapa. Masa tu, sedang menjalin hubungan sulit dengan Megat Junid Megat Ayob. Well dude, see you in the hereafter. I mean, if u really DID ORDER THE KILL, she'd be waiting for you on the other side. Dont say we never warned you..

Kes 5: Haslezah Ishak

In 2002 the decomposed body of Haslezah Ishak, the attractive young second wife of Raja Jaafar Raja Muda Musa, second in line to the throne of Perak, whom he had met in a karaoke lounge, was found under a bridge, clad in a bra and jeans. Four men, including a palace aide, a bomoh or witch doctor, a fisherman and a carpenter were arrested and jailed for the murder.

-Haslezah Ishak, isteri jelita Raja Jaafar, dibunuh oleh 4 lelaki yang bersubahat. Kononnya isteri pertama Raja Jaafar disyaki, namun tidak pernah disiasat atau dikaitkan dengan pembunuhan tersebut. What the fudge?

Kes 6: Norita Shamsudin (everybody knew this case)

Norita Shamsudin, was found murdered in an apartment in a Kuala Lumpur suburb. A night club guest relations officer, Norita had been rumored to be having an affair with Shahidan Kassim, then chief minister of the state of Perlis. Although another individual was arrested and charged with the murder, he was later declared not guilty and no one else was ever charged. According to local news reports, the inspector general of police, Mohd Bakri Omar, classified the case under Malaysia's Official Secrets Act and no details were ever released.

I mean, this is really 'fudging moment'. Kes itu di classified as Akta Rahsia Rasmi? OSA? what the fudge??

Kes 7: Sujatha Krishnan

Earlier this year, authorities finally completed an inquest into the 2007 death of beautiful ethnic Indian actress Sujatha Krishnan, who also worked part-time as a secretary to S.Vell Paari, chief executive officer of Maika Holdings and the son of S. Samy Vellu, the head of the Malaysian Indian Congress, a component of the ruling national coalition. Sujatha died in a hospital in a Kuala Lumpur suburb of Klang three days after she had been rushed in for treatment. Her body was cremated almost immediately after her death. The coroner ruled she had died after poisoning herself by drinking poison. The family vainly requested an investigation into her death.

-wanita bernasib malang, dikatakan ada hubungan dengan anak Samy Vellu. disahkan kononnya minum racun, belum sempat disiasat dengan rapi, terus dibakar mayatnya. so sad...

KEMATIAN DALAM TAHANAN POLIS

1990 - 2004 = 150 KEMATIAN

2000-2006 = 106 KEMATIAN

2003-2007 = 85 KEMATIAN

Deputy Home Minister Chor Chee Heung denied that methods of torture used to obtain information from suspects led to their deaths. He claimed that the majority of deaths were the result of attempts to escape from police custody. Typical seemed to be the case of Hasrizal Hamzah, who had been detained on suspicion of murder in October of 2003. According to a senior assistant police commissioner, Harizal confessed to the murder and then, as he was being moved to a new location, supposedly shoved the accompanying policeman aside despite being handcuffed, and leapt over a balcony to his death.

- HASRIZAL HAMZAH, ditangkap atas tuduhan membunuh dan telah mengaku, dikatakan telah menolak seorang pegawai polis, dan terus lompat dari balkoni, mati menemui ajal.. (beliau digari sewaktu kejadian..) wait,, senang ke nak lompat balkoni kalau tangan digari dibelakang?

p/s: Xenan, cuba kita wat experiment nih jap. men gari2 pastu try lompat. hahaha.. :P

Earlier this year, the Indian community was enraged by the death of a 22-year-old named Kugan Ananthan who was detained on Jan. 15 on suspicion of stealing luxury cars. He reportedly collapsed during questioning and died on Jan. 20 from "acute pulmonary edema," or fluid in the lungs. However, after his body was released to his family, an autopsy found that he had suffered from internal bleeding in his heart, left lung, spleen, kidneys and scalp area. The soles of his feet had been beaten and the back of his neck and spine area were bleeding. His back was covered with contusions, beating marks and bruises.

Kes Kugan yang mati dalam tahanan. Semua orang tahu kes ini..

p/s: no one deserved to die in vain. not one person can take away another person life. murder can never be justified. i mean, truly, will justice prevail. here we are, in the dark ages on 1Malaysia. who will change this, if we didnt?

kita kawin nanti besar... jam berapa kita berjumpa?

2009-10-29T17:13:00.001+08:00

"KAKAK!! KAKAKKK!! ada surat~~"

huh.. bebudak darjah satu.. berlari2 anak ke arah i. yang paling depan, pegang cam sehelai kertas warna pink... alamak.. ada surat chenta for me?

"KAKAK!!ADA SURAT!! TOLONG BACA.. KAMI TAK TAHU BACA~~"

aik. ces~~ ingat surat to diri sendirik. hihi.. bebudak kecik nih duduk keliling den. yang paling depan pass surat tu kat den.

"mana dapat surat nih?"

"PUTRI BAGI KAT SHAMIRUL!! TAPI SHAMIRAUL TAK TAHU BACA..."

bebudak gelak ramai2.. yg nama shamirul tu duduk tersiput-siput kat belakang... ceh~ dah sah2 sumer budak kecik ni pon tak reti baca lagi...

den amik surat tu. surat tu kena lipat dua. tengok muka depan.. wakakakakaaka.. berair mata den gelak...
tengok muka dalam... sikit lagi den tergolek dr kerusi... wakakaka.. hihihi.. kah kah kah....

nih muka depan surat tu..

muka dalamnya pulak...

hadoi la.. bebudak nih punya gelak sakan den tokleh crita. den pon smpi mata berair2 gelak ngan bebudak kecik nih... di kejauhan.. Putri dok sengih2....

p/s: aih.. alangkah bestnya jadi budak kecil...

ini khas tok angah!! enjoyyyyeeee~~

2009-10-27T02:47:00.001+08:00

ngah, nih den spesel dedikasi kek ekau ngah.. moga2, ekau jgn le tunggu dah tua kematu br nak blaja english... hihi.... :p :p

jom nyanyi sesama.. weehee.. tepok tangan clap clap~~

bila dulu ku disekolah~~

aku.. tak mahu belajari~~

matapelajaran ini yang hari ini amat penting sekali

bahasa ingeris amat penting sekali dimasa ini

dulu waktu kelas bahasa english..

aku main snooker di wilayah kompleks sampi pukul tige..

oh bebalnyer aku...~~

tapi kini bila ku dah tua..

aku ingin mempelajari

kerana ku takmu ditipu oleh sesiapa

bila pergi ke 7-11atau supermarket..

and learning english is good for you..~~

bajet 2010 : pergantungan kepada 'old money'

2009-10-25T20:00:00.002+08:00

previously on bajet 2010: http://evnyle.blogspot.com/2009/10/belanjawan-2010-in-my-own-humble-short.html

dulu masa jaman kanak-kanak, profesor den tanya, bila grad nak kerja apa? den katalah, den nak jadi engineer, kalau boleh dlm industry oil and gas. tp, masa den final year, den nyer projek adalah berkaitan ngan susu lembu. projek den agak rumit jugak la. kene develop mathematical model dgn mengintegrasikan rumus-rumus biologi, biochemistry, DNA, mesin2, matematik, dlm sistem engineering, agar boleh tahu, berapa kebrangkalian manusia utk sakit dan mati jika terminum susu lembu yang dicemari sejenis mikroorganisma bernama Escherichia Colony. nama manja nya, E. Coli. oittt.. E Coli disebut dgn 'E-Kolai'. jgn memandai sebut dgn lidah gen melayu plak. so hari2 masuk lab, didih susu lembu, tgk bawah microscope electrone, wat Gram test, wat bacterial count, mcm2 la. Ala2 CSI jugak. CSI + NUMB3RSs gitu.

bila den sebut pasal cita-cita den nak masuk bidang oi and gas, prof den tu terdiam sejenak. dia pon kata lah, oil n gas is good money, but its an OLD MONEY. dia kata malaysia nih dirahmati dengan sumber asli yang banyak, and surprisingly, malaysia sgt bertuah, kerana kedudukan geografi betul-betul diluar lingkaran api pasifik, sedangkan negara2 lain sekitar kita, sering kena malapetaka. masa tuh, den kanak-kanak lagi, hanya mengangguk saja.

lagi, profesor tu membebel lagi. old money is expensive. will remain expensive. and will be getting more expensive as times go by. but it will reach a saturation point. titik tepu katanya. bila sampai ke titik tepu, then masa ni, anything can happened to the oil and gas industry. saturation point, boleh bertukar menjadi inflection point. titik berputar? apa translation inflection nih? i dont know, but maksud prof den nih, titik inflection nih adalah titik dimana, harga oil and gas boleh swing upwards, or swing downwards. katanya lagi, it doesnt matter which way it swings, because, when we come to that point, meaning, oil and gas is no longer the source of wealth. meaning, its either people abondon oil and gas due to new sustainable fuel, or people succumb to the belief hat oil and gas has depleted.

either way, apa yg prof den nih cuba nak cakap ialah, malaysia is too dependent on oil and gas. after 30 years of digging into mother earth, by now, malaysia should have enough capital to venture into other sectors.

1. capital cost
2. human capital
3. technologies (can be derived from capital cost)
4. vast land
5.... and so on.

but, after 30 years, we are still stuck at the same spot. malaysia sgt bergantung pada pendapatan oil and gas (read: petronas). from dr dzul blog:

Kebergantungan pendapatan dari sumber minyak mentah dan gas dalam bentuk dividen, cukai, royalti dan duti ekspot minyak mentah dan gas sudah ke peringkat kritikal. Dari RM19 bilion pada 2004 kepada RM67.8 bilion tahun 2009 atau 43.5 % dari pendapatan kerajaan Pusat. Bukan sahaja ia satu yang tidak wajar, bahkan kita juga tidak menabung ketika sumber pendapatan ini lumayan. Kalau pada tahun 2005 Petronas menyimpan 42.5% dari keuntungannya, kini ia hanya menabung 21.1% dari keuntungannya. Bermakna kita telah membelanjakan kekayaan sumber anak-cucu kita.

for the past 5 years, same ol same ol. pergantungan pada oil n gas semakin bertambah, tapi kadar simpanan semakin berkurang.. i mean.. what the [insert profanity]?

ok, this is only one example. why am i bothered to even write this when obviously, semua org tgh teruja dengan topik EGM? no one cares about the bajet. same ol same ol right?

wait.. lets backtrack a bit.

its because, this is one tiny example of why PR really sux. i mean, i am still waiting for the opposition to seek out their 'official responds' on this matter. national budget is a big thing. where is the analysis from the opposition point of view? i mean, the collective voice of Pakatan Rakyat. mana dia kenyataan rasmi PAS ke, DAP ke, PKR ke about this budget that really sux. as a collective parties, kena la ada suara bersama, yang membahaskan bajet camnih. its like last year jugak. if last year pembangkang mempersoalkan bajet 2009 yg lebih kurang je mcm di yer nye bajet.. at least this year gov will try to do better (we can all wish...) but at least, u gotta try right?

and also, kalau ada analisis yg betul2 keluar bersama dari PR, boleh la disampaikan pada rakyat, at least bg penyokong atau ahli baca. itu pun satu cara memberi pendidikan agar org tahu pembohongan atau lip service gov nih. nih maklumat bersepah2 dlm blog. bercelaru.

awareness and knowledge, remember? bridging the gaps, remember?

kalau pun sibuk ber EGM ke, ada masalah dlm parti ke, bercakar sesama pemimpin, kebajikan rakyat jgn lupa. aih.. ni lah kelemahan PR nih. sibuk berpolitik. benda lain, semua rasa tak penting. sbb kononnya, kalau dah perintah Malaysia nanti, eprkara2 begitu akan termasuk dlm kuasa pemerintah, so its ok la kan? bugger..

sejujurnya, takde gov in waiting pon kat malaysia nih. itu pun cuma lip service opposition. bagilah dulu PR ni pandai jaga politik dlm parti. they've got miles to go in terms of administering good governing skills.

Ya ALlah.. Perkenanlah doa kami...

2009-10-25T14:20:00.000+08:00

Ya Allah,
Diri yang hina sujud memohon padaMu ya Rahman,
Mohon doa ini diperkenan Ya Allah,
Jika ada kebaikan dalam kegelapan,
Andai ada hikmah dalam kekhilafan,
Cerahkanlah penglihatan kami,
Limpahkan lah taufik dan hidayahMu pada kami,
Berikanlah petunjuk kepada sahabat, pejuang dan pemimpin kami,
Bantulah kami, kuatkanlah saf kami,

Tunjukkanlah kami jalan yang benar,

Mohon lindunganMu ya Rahman..

Daripada hasutan syaitan yang direjam..

Dan tohmahan manusia yang dendam,
Dalam impian kami menjulang syiarMu dimuka bumi,
Berikanlah kekuatan, keazaman, kecekalan dalam misi kami,
Lindungi kami dari kezaliman penentang syiarMu,
Pasakkan kaki kami teguh dibumi,
Teguhkan hati kami mendepani mehnah dan kemelut hari ini,
dan juga hari-hari yang bakal mendatang...

Ameen..Ameen..Ameen ya Rabb..

bro Xenan create logo diatas, ikutkan suara hati i jugak ler. jom pakat letak kat blog masing2...
JZK. sila klik blog beliau kalau nak get the widget. i dont know how to put wijet mijet yg siap leh scroll2 neh.. nak senang, direct je logo tu kat photobucket beliau disini http://i602.photobucket.com/albums/tt102/reset_edi/logo-reform1.jpg...

moga usaha yg kecil membawa kepada manfaat yang besar...

Willie Harcourt-Cooze's Chocolate Brownie Recipe

2009-10-25T03:45:00.002+08:00

Willie Harcourt-Cooze's Chocolate Brownie Recipe. (Serves 4)

Ingredients:
200g unsalted butter,
180g chocolate: a bar of venezuelan black (100% cacao) or equivalent good dark chocolate,
5 eggs,
350 g sugar: half caster & half muscovado,
200g almonds,
3 teaspoons vanilla essence,
100 g shelled walnuts, crushed or 100 g chocolate nibs, crushed.

How to make it:
1. Preheat oven to 170 degrees (fan oven).
2. Line an 11" square baking tray with greaseproof paper (don't worry if if your baking tray is a little smaller or a little larger).
3. In a heavy pan, melt the chocolate and butter over a low heat. in your mixer whisk the eggs for a minute, followed by the sugar for another minute, then the almonds and vanilla. lastly add the walnuts or nibs to your silky chocolatey blend, whisk it all together for a minute.
4. Pour into baking tray and bake for 40 - 45 minutes.
5. Cut into squares, in the tray, while still warm, then leave to cool... Before eating!

credit to ABJ. who wanted to try, feel free. i'm not really a brownies or cookies person.. hehe...

defintely maybe

2009-10-24T19:20:00.003+08:00

i think i might watch this. just for fun. its just a movie anyway. click here for the plot summary. click here for the full synopsis (contain spoilers).

"...Whilst waiting for their order, Summer blurts out that she thinks they should stop seeing each other. Tom is taken aback..."

life goes on, like it or not. it leaves trail behind, but in time, trail will eventually vanished. whats left of it, is memory. there are millions questions one might be wanting to ask, find excuses, but whats the comfort in knowing the answers? what one cannot know, the heart cannot grieve over, right?

live by the sun, love by the moon..

if the dream is big enough, the facts don't matter..

belanjawan 2010 : in my own humble, short sighted opinion (UPDATED SOMEWHERE..)

2009-10-24T18:01:00.000+08:00

* Focus of Budget 2010 will be on well-being of the people (lets see if our well being is going to improve after 50 years of UMNO reign in power)

* Three strategies:
- driving the country towards a high-income economy. (mengikut tafsiran world bank, high income economy is countries with Gross National Income perkapita of $11,906 in 2008. our GNI is actually $7500, meaning, we are at the upper middle income, which is not so bad, considering there are 66 countries who are at the high income groups. haha.. more on this later).

- ensuring holistic and sustainable development (going by speed thinking, our resources (read: oil n gas) are depleting. but of course, 30 years ago, they said the same thing. why? because, 30 years ago, they can only dig so deep. now, the depth of digging that were done says our oil n gas are going to deplete soon, again. but who knows, 5 years from now, Shell will create new technologies that allow us to dig deeper into the earth, till the core, and find some more oil n gas. it happened b4, but dont count on it, if we are moving into sustainable development, we need something 'tangible', i.e sector that actually based on technologies that never goes out of fashion, say electronics, IT, infrastructure. say good bye to old technologies. if we are moving forward, we need to embrace and become the industrialized nation. dem the capitalist for suxing up my life.)

- focusing on the well-being of the rakyat.

* Government to make it easier for skilled/qualified people to get permanent residence status. Visa to be granted for family within 14 days. (yeah, we are turning into singapore. did i read somewhere where our politicians criticize singapore for giving PR status to sportsmen so that singapore can be better in sports too as compared with Malaysia. haha.. well, in a way, have we fallen this deep, are malaysian so stupid we have to beg and entice the foreigners to come n serve us n give them PR status in doing so? its definitely a case of brain drain. hurm, i wonder, if the smart malaysians are not entice, not interested in staying in malaysia n work in malaysia, what makes the gov think that they can entice the foreigners to come n serve us?)

* CSR Fund of RM100mil to be set up to carry out social programmes.(just 100million?? come on la pak najib. those big companies, earning billions n billions n billions, all you can come up with is 100million of CSR? ok CSR is actually corporate social responsibilty. whereby they took into accounts all the impact their business have on env, people, employees, cats, dogs, animal, etc. its people-planet-profit. in Petronas, they have what they called 'energy received, energy returns, aspiring people everywhere' as part of their CSR projects. i mean, come on la, 100million? these bloodsuckers capitalist suxing up our money, they shud be giving back billions of it back instead of making certain CEOs live like a mirror image of saudi King.)

* Tax breaks for registration of patents and copyrights. ( i second this)

* Big scale factory outlets to be set up to boost tourism besides having major events like KL Grand Prix Fest, National Water Festival, Malaysia International Golf Exhibition and Rain Forest Eco-Challenges (what the fuck is this? u mean, waste more money? then again, whos going to build all those big scale factory? fuxers btol.)

* Taxpayers will get tax relief on broadband subscription fee of up to RM500 from 2010 to 2012. Civil servants can apply for computer loans up to a maximum of RM5,000 from the govt once in every 5 years. (hurm.. right.. not only that the civil servants get to play facebook all the time in their office, now u go n make them easier to get computers. do u know that civil servants are everywhere in facebook? pak najib, why not, have this scheme instead. every household in malaysia, get a special sceme whereby every household in malaysia, can own a computer. why not, for every 5KM areas, the gov set up a WIFI hotspot. why not? then everybody can own their internet enterprise. thats sustainability if u asked me. internet is self-sufficient. every housewife then can go market their products online. they can sell manik to US. its income for the country. no? plus, in those metro areas, they already got broadband, but the point is, can we have a faster broadband isntead of the one u offered now which got bottlenecked all the time? the issue is not only make it easier n cheaper for ppl to own broadband, but to have a good quality broadband thats worth their money!)

* RM6bil for agriculture sector for irrigation of paddy fields, fish production, fruit farming, livestock farming infrastructure, training. (hurm.. every year, you did this. sana sini subsidi, but may i ask, how come we are stil short on kobis? just now i watched on telly, we are lacking in kobis. i dont really like kobis, but millions in malaysia apparently love kobis. so how come, after years n years of subsidy in agriculture, we still dont have enough kobis? or, are our kobis going abroad like their friends encik bawang putihs? fuxer btol. n, how come last year n year b4 dat, u subsidy the nelayan, but nelayan kecil still suffer. why is that? is it because ur ko-nelayan sux? is it because, the ko-nelayan only layan nelayan kapal besar? again, suxer.)

* RM2bil subsidy for farmers and fishermen including subsidies for fertilisers, incentives for padi yields and allowances for fishermen (comment already up there. ok, paddy again. why our paddy is more expensive compare to padi siam? can someone pls tell me why it is cheaper to import? is it because some monopoly on the import permit? is it because BERNAS are fuxing stupid? or am i just plain ignorant? i dont want to eat rice anymore la. im not going to support this beras kapitalis to. hehe..)

* RM9bil to finance infrastructure projects including road and bridges projects and rail, sea ports and airports facilities (kiss my cute bunny la. every year got finance road la, bridges la. the only one i can see got financed properly is airport. n gugel urself who got the project of upgrading the airport in sabah. sabah roads? are not design for speed. really. it was design for....outback driving cause the potholes are so big, u might as well be driving 4x4 and burn all ur small compact car. kancil shud be ban in sabah because its not safe to drive small cars).

* RM1.5bil fund to promote green technology by providing soft loans to companies that supply and use green technology (i second this. but this is more like wait-and-see. say, if i want to be a farmer, a fertigation one, will they give me enough money to go RnD in using organic fertz? or, is this all make up only? ya lar, PRU13 is coming. all these budgets are like candy sugar for the low & middle income groups, the nelayan, the petani, the civil seervants, even the students and the people in entertainment bizness who must be supporting the gov. fuxer..)

* RM200mil Creative Industry Fund to finance film, drama, music productions, animation, advertisements through Bank Simpanan Nasional (aiks, got this one ka, see, i told you already up there.. hehe. to check whether this is true or not, AT have to go n ask for fund for his project langgar hadi.AT shud go to BSN and ask can they finance his langgar hadi project? hahaha..)

* RM30bil to be allocated to enhance primary and secondary school education nationwide. ( i second this. please be serious about this. but please, dont go using those money to keep changing text books. pls add mroe computers in school, have good WIFI in school, trained teachers who can all speak english properly.)

* Rewards for students who excel in studies:
- 30 National Scholarships for the creme de la creme of students, stictly based on merit. (i second this, based on merit, and to hell with quota n ketuanan melayu.)

- Conversion of PTPTN loans to scholarships for students who graduate with 1st class honours degree, beginning from 2010. (i second this, because apparently, when they signed up the agreement, most of them are still kids, including someone i know).

- Offer of netbook package, including free broadband service, to university students for RM50 per month for 2 years. (ok, got pros n cons here. do u know that IPT students spent hours in facebook n social networking? thats without the rm50 fund injection. imagine if got rm50 injection into their internet n social infrastructures. hurmm.....)

* The Permata programme, which emphasises on early childcare and education, including the gifted child programme, to get RM100mil. (ok, thats the wifey project, of course la he wanted to make her happy. have to give more actually, rm100milions not enuff, cause shes going to be needing new shoes, new tote handbags, new make ups, more botox injections, more slimming sessions more trips to harrods in london or bloomingdales in NY..i wish i can be her personal shopper so i can advice her on good wardrobe. as slobby as i am, i got more fashion sense than this wifey of somebody. warghahahaha... )

* Insurance industry to be improved to meet market demand. (ok, i want the 3rd party insurance to be in place)

* Govt to clamp down on the abuses committed by Ah Longs by enforcing Anti-Money Laundering and Anti Terrorism Financing Act 2001. Moneylenders Act 1951 to be also reviewed. (ok, u want to do this, fine. but really, all u should be doing is advising the bank and money lenders not to be such a blood suckers in term of terms of borrowing. i mean, u think these people want to go to ah long ka if the bank would lend them money? and also, do whatever in ur power to ensure bank's interest rate to be lower. dont segregate between civil servnts n private sector people. why gomen servants get lower interest rate? to encourage them to spend more? loan more? i dont understand this. enlighten me...)

updates here!! hey, do u know that so many AH LONG today are disguising as Syarikat Wang Berlesen. they operate like this. They lend you money, say RM6,000. they straightaway deducted your debt by using the Biro Angkasa system. but you know what, u borrow rm6000, u ended up paying RM14,000 plus interest. so whats the government going to do about this?? THIS IS EVEN WORSE THAN ALONG. ITS AHLONG THAT IS ENDORSED BY THE GOVERNMENT!!! FUXERRR!!!

* Allow 100% foreign equity participation in corporate finance and financial planning companies compared with the present requirement of at least 30% local shareholding. (blaaaaaah).

* To ensure rapid development of financial services, the existing tax incentives to be extended to 2015. (blaaahh)

* Among steps to combat corruption is to set up 14 Special Corruption Sessions Courts and 4 Special Corruption Appeal High Courts. (whats the use of having so many courts, so many acts regarding corruption, when the real issue is, transparency in handling cases. put up so many courts, will still never going to curb corruption, its the PEOPLE MONEY and POWER who caused rampant corruption, not because of inadequate courts and acts. this government n pak najib, stupid or what?)

* Tax of 5% to be imposed on gains from the disposal of real property from Jan 1, 2010. Existing tax exemption will be retained for gifts between parent-child, husband-wife, grandparent-grandchild. (ok good lah)
* To promote prudent spending, a service charge of RM50 a year to be imposed on each principal credit card and charge card; and RM25 a year on each supplementary card, effective from Jan 1, 2010. (i dont own one anymore. its stupid to have credit cards really. even if u dun use it, u still have to pay.)

* To ensure that fuel subsidies only benefit targeted groups, Govt will implement a fuel subsidy management system in early 2010, which will utilise the MyKad. (NICE, THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. I HOPE THE GOV DONT GIVE SUBSIDY TO THOSE PEOPLE WHO OWNS MERCEDES OR BMW OR PEUGEOT. I MEAN, FOR GOD SAKE, THESE PEOPLE ALREADY OWN KERETA MEWAH, THEY OBVIOUSLY DONT NEED THE SUBSIDY. PLUS THEIR CARS EAT MORE PETROL THAN OUR SMALL CC CAR. BUGGERS THE RICHMEN)

* All ministries and govt departments are required to provide day care and education centres for children of civil servants. (haha.. good luck with these. every year also want to set up nursery, but the career women ended up in TASKA or private nursery who charges them high rates. kesian these women.)

* The maximum income tax rate for individuals to be reduced to 26% from assessment year 2010. Personal relief increased to RM9,000. (ok, thanks. but i hate to see the tax i paid, little as it might be, being used to fund or bail out dying company or being used by ur wife to buy her PRADA or or Nine West shoes.)

* Police force to get RM1bil to improve its services in govt's efforts to reduce crime. Major measures include to increase police presence, including mobile police stations in 50 crime hotspots. (ok, i second this, which means, hire more police? or the existing one have to work more hours?)

* To promote house ownership, Govt will launch a scheme that enables EPF contributors to utilise current and future savings in Account 2. ( i dont own one, but good lah i think..)

* Employees' EPF contribution to be increased to 11% again, on a voluntary basis, effective immediately. However, from Jan 1, 2011 employees' EPF contribution will revert to 11%. (aih, can increase then revert back? what the catch?)

* Personal relief for EPF and life insurance schemes to be increased to RM7,000. (ok, i dont know, but sounds good enuff)

thats my take on the budget 2010. u got ur say in this matter?

diversity of 1Malaysia

2009-10-24T05:09:00.002+08:00

i had a long day yesterday. drove all the way to kk at dawn, had 2 'legal meetings' with 2 different lawyers. one is going to ask for my blood, one is going to act as my saviour. but of course, as a savior, he's gonna make me bled to death too. aint that the way of the world?

but anyway, what caught my attention during those strenous meeting was the fact that my newly appointed lawyer, Jack, is such a cool guy. we talked bout my case most of the times, but here and there, he make remarks that showed 'his calibre'. he asked me how old i am, told him im already 28, tho, he was surprised because he thot i looked 'young' and 'fresh' out of school. and i was like, yeah, im fresh graduate from 'school of life' where they taught you all the 'cruel ways' of the world. haha.. and he told me, im too young to be that cynical. and i told him, well, sue me. he laughed his ass off because, he told me, with a straight face, that i got enough summons already, and in fact, mine was not called a summon, its called 'writ of summon'. the mother of all summons. hahaha.. another sue would defnitely bled me dry. haha.. very funny jack. oh yeah, he told me that im now in the same league as those UMNO politicians who got sued all the time, and all those big companies, who also got in legal mess all the time.we had a good laugh at that. dont ask me how did i get myself in this mess..

now, this is a messy sordid affair. jack asked me during our initial preparation for defence, am i really okay? he told me he was paid to do all the stuff, (paid handsomely if u ask me, a drop of 5K for a single session, he is damn well going to do all the stuff), but he was wondering, whether i should go for a councelling? i asked him, do i look like i need one? he told me, i was too 'calm', too 'focus', too 'serene', too 'composed'. he said, summon this big on an individual, usually makes a person go beserk, go crazy, asking all sorts of questions. i was quiet for a moment. then i asked him, what else should i ask actually? cause i have never been sued before. jack laughed. he told me, i am being funny all the time. huh, did u see me laughing jack?

well anyway, i dont want to go into my legal affairs. afraid one of you, my avid readers, are one of those people im going after. haha. kidding. well, when i was first given his number, i called him and told te background of my story. and let me tell you this, i have called 2 other lawyers previously, and they declined. i arrived at jack office, and he was surprised. for a moment actually. he said, you sound like an 'Evelyn' on the phone, but in person, you still look like an 'Evelyn', but you dont dress like one. very funny. he thot i was a Christian, and this is what i want to talk about. at least.... (wow, so long the intro eh..)

He talked about how 1Malaysia concept, can only be realized in Borneo. He even quote what our PM Najib mentioned about Sabah being the best example of 1Malaysia. 1Malaysia still has miles to go in Semenanjung. especially among the low level society where education are all the traditional values picked from years of cultures, languages and traditions in various ethnics and races. In Borneo, according to Jack, we always lived in harmony, we never segregate Kadazan, Chinese, Malay, Indian, Rungus and whatnots. even our nenek moyang, atuk nenek n makcik n pakci that never went to school, is 'unaware' of being racist. Because, here, according to jack, being diversified, living amidst diversify culture, is OUR WAY OF LIFE. we dont have to be taught how to live peacefully wit each other, because, living in harmony, has always been our style of living.. We can all go clubbing with Malays and Muslims, and we are okay with them if they go to Jumaat prayers the next day.. (okay, i am not going to argue with a lawyer about his logic on that one example...)

but i somewhat agree with him on his view of 1Malaysia. i see many differences between living as 'me' in Semenanjung and living as 'me' here. not that i am an avid supporter of 1Malaysia concept, i am just conveying thots of this one lawyer. He sees the beauty of being diversified in traditions, cultures, ethnics. When most people focused on the differences, he thot having differences are a 'blessing'. he told me how half his family are Muslims (same goes for me) and he loves the fact that everybody goes on living a harmony life, no one tried to convert the other, but actually live and appreciate each other views and faiths.

and of course, here, its so rare you hear people get angry and curse according to their mix and races. for example.. if someone suddenly take a turn without giving signal, you dont hear them yell "bodoh punya [insert race] , balik negara asal kau dekat [insert coutnry] " or "stupid [insert profanity] [insert race], kecik-kecik datang malaysia, woi balik la [insert country], bangsat punya [insert race, again] " nah, those racist remark hardly heard around here.

now, i havent actually read much on 1Malaysia concept. but im going to read it later. if i can find the time..

of reason, passion and mission..

2009-10-23T05:15:00.000+08:00

reading blog tok guru for the first time, has a very calming effect on tortured soul. if i had known this, i would have been reading it a long time ago.. his latest entry, titled: Keperluan Muktamar PAS Luar Biasa says it all. its a voice of reason amidst everything else that happened lately.

of lately, there are many 'voices of passion' concerning matters related to the higher up leadership in PAS. some of them was said in the 'heat of passion'. more like 'passionate attack' by many sharpshooters, but its adequate to say, they lacked proper guns and bullets. what i really meant was, you can be shooting all the way, but if u really want to hit ur target, u'd be needing a powerful sets of guns n bullets, preferably, the long-range type. its what i'd called, having the right tool for the right mission.

awareness & knowledge are both the utmost essential tools in bridging the gaps of understanding between many people. for, without proper understanding, we are bound to forget the basics of all things mattered. like what tokguru proposed, special muktamar is what we actually need. at least for now. but, for a longer term, what we really need is a massive reformation, not only among the top leaders, but for every individual who called themselves supporters or members, from the grassroot level up to the topmost level.

its a long shot, but, a mile run, started off with a nice slow warm ups. otherwise, u get cramps in the end, even if u can finish ur run, in style.

updates:
read bro Xenan's posting here. he got some pointers. last nite, i sort of have doubt about this EGM, but at least, for now, its imperative that EGM be held so that immediate action can be taken. Its so- called 'damage control' on the leadership level. But as i have said, it goes nothing if only the topmost level that undergo reformation. The grassroot level, and every individuals has to undergo 'mental revolution'. Every mental needs a revving up. Already tell two persons about this 'tajdid' thing. If no 'tajdid' or reformation taken now, in the long run, like Xenan put it nicely, PAS will be facing EGM again.. like it or not, its the PEOPLE who always start a revolution or reformation, not the country leader. it can also be interpret as, its the low level /grassrot level individuals/group who always initiate 'pembaharuan' or tajdid, straight from the bottom up..

Hitler rants over Pendet Dance (Parody)

2009-10-22T05:34:00.000+08:00

someone on my YM put this utube as his status, it got me laughing there for a minute.. but then.. well, whatever, whats ur take fella?

afterall, this is a prody, albeit its a nasty one :)

of maturity, elegance and finesse..

2009-10-21T21:02:00.000+08:00

i cant help, but wonder why, some people, just would not be cool over some 'dispute'..

jom baca disini: http://baganutama.blogspot.com/2009/10/post-mortem-prk-bagan-pinang-teguran.html

intipatinya: sang penulis berasa agak berang dan tidak berpuas hati kerana:

1. foto yang diambil rakan seperjuangan telah dicilok dan kononnya di edit oleh satu pihak yang lain (team IT PAS).
2. video utube kononnya di cipta oleh si polan rupanya di cilok dari sumber lain tanpa diwar-warkan sumbernya.

dan sang penulis mengaitkan perbuatan ini dengan mengatakan:

"Sepatutnya sya-reformis dihargai dan dijulang hasil kerjanya.Dia patut diberi pujian. Ingat senang ke nak masuk kem askar tu. Ini boleh pulak team it Pas senang-senang potong signature sya-reformis dan cuba nak tampilkan bahawa itu hasil kerja team mereka. Isa Samad betullah engkorang ni. Sya-reformis itu adalah Ketua Srikandi Parti Keadilan Rakyat. Jika yang bukan calang-calang orang pun dia boleh bikin macam tu, apatah lagi dengan bloggers dari Baganutama."

And he went so far as saying this..:

"Adakah sindrom ketidakjujuran unit Team It Pas ini berlaku kerana belajar dari pemimpin mereka yang selalu menipu dan berdolak dalih dalam isu Unity Government ???"

=============================================

cuba kita berhenti sejenak nak menggunakan kewarasan minda, kecerdikan akal, dan melihat isu ini sebagai satu problem yang mudah diselesaikan tanpa perlu menampakkan seolah2 sang penulis menyerang habis2an team IT PAS yang dikatakan mencilok dan membuat perkara yang mengaibkan dengan mengambil bahan tanpa menyatakan sumber. satu tuduhan yang berat, yang diwartakan pada publik tanpa cuba mengetahui cerita pihak yang satu lagi terlebih dahulu. SIla rujuk ruang komen.

1. inilah level cerdik ahli PAS yang semberono dan gopoh dalam menyelesaian konflik. perlukah penulis artikel berkenaan membuat serangan2 begitu sebelum menyelidik dahulu ataupun menghubungi dahulu team IT PAS itu sendiri? sehinggakan perlu team IT itu tampil dalam ruang komen?

2. sepatutnya, atas dasar brotherhood in Islam, apatah lagi mengibar panji yang sama, penulis patutnya berusaha menghubungi team IT PAS yang dimaksudkan, dan bertanya tentang sumber2 foto demikian, dan sekiranya terbukti ada kekeliruan, penulis sewajarnya memohon pihak team IT PAS mengeluarkan kenyataan susulan dan jika perlu kenyataan maaf di web mereka berkenaan kekeliruan perawi sumber tersebut. seterusnya, penulis boleh membuat kenyataan yang sama di blog baganutama.

jika pihak yang dikatakan mencilok enggan membuat kenyataan maaf atau berkeras, maka sudah wajarlah penulis mengemukakan bantahan melalui blog, namun step ini cuma boleh diambil jika saluran diplomasi, diskusi menemui kegagalan.

3. cara begini, lebih dewasa, matured & elegant, with a touch of finesse. nampak profesional, matang dan berwibawa. daripada membuat serangan-serangan dengan artikel yang agak berbaur tuduhan, dan kemungkinan mengeruhkan hubungan sesama pasukan yang mempunyai misi yang sama..

4. pengasingan tajuk2 tertentu. bila saya memberi komen dlm ruang artikel, penulis berkenaan membalas dengan memberi perbandingan tentang 'konspirasi gelap UG'. sebenarnya, nak tergelak pun ada. tak payah la pula saya nak jelaskan beza antara konspirasi gelap UG dengan isu yang dibangkitkan (hal ciplak foto) sebab terang lagi bersuluh perbezaannya. nak bagi analogi pun, jgn la main sapu rata saja. fighter for UG, tp jgn lah longgokkan semua isu dibawah bayang2 UG. fobia UG ke apa?

===============================================

my main point is that, when confronted with issues or problems or disputes, we should always be encouraged to find the most diplomatic solutions, given certain circumstances and time frame. afterall, tak rugi pon kalau cuba bertindak dengan matang, melebihkan persaudaraan, memfokuskan pada isu, dan tidak membuat keputusan berdasarkan hal-hal atau isu-isu lepas. membiasakan diri selaku individu yang profesional akan setiap tindakan. jgn semberono saja menyerang sana sini tanpa memikirkan rentetan nya...

.

2009-10-19T03:07:00.001+08:00

don't stay up too late..
try to sleep early..
don't smoke too much..
or else u'll get sick..
nite sleepyhead..
m.u..
so damn much..

why i can never watch nur kasih..

2009-10-18T14:54:00.000+08:00

the other day, ayu asked me whether i watched nur kasih @tv3. and i said no.. i didnt watch it, but i know about the drama. she said why i didnt watch it, i told her, i just didnt watch it. truth is, i could never watch it.. period.

the thing is, i just dont watch any kind of soapy love dramas like that. any kind of heavy love stories, i stay away from those kind. why? i dont know. i just dont. i used to watch korean, japanese dramas, but lately, meaning, for the past 2 or 3 years, i stopped watching em. why? i just dont want to... even if i wanted to, i'd be watching half way, n decided, well, its too much already. cant watch no more. the end.. hehe...

but i go for romantic comedy, something light, something easy. haha.. something i can laugh about, something that has got meaning, but still light enuff for me to stomach. anyway, i just dont watch those heavy kinds.. because, like it or not, chances are, you'd be watching ur own sad story unfolding in front of you. and i really dont need any kind of reminder of any blunder i've gone thru. period..

but oh.. i do love songs. not love songs tho.. just nice easy songs.. just now on my fb (omg.. why am i suddenly spending hours on my fb?), my old friend from school asked us to listen back to lifehouse. ahh.... now that was a band i used to love so much. what with the handsome guy with an angelic voice.. (droooll~~~~). lifehouse must be the only band whose songs are all so deep n meaningful. masa sekolah dulu, i rarely listen to boyband (tho everybody else are so hooked up with backstreetboys), me n the gurls go for lifehouse, greenday, n some alternative bands which right now, escapes my feeble mind.

so, anyway, my point is, jom layan lifehouse.. :P

planning n running

2009-10-18T13:55:00.002+08:00

just now chatting ngan two of my sisters on facebook. aiyah, kids jaman skarang, they dont reply ur sms, they didnt on their ym, but rest assure, u can find them in facebook online all day playing games. n dat goes the same for my sisters. so today, im in the mood to go wasting my time on facebook. omg, my sisters are so notti, they go n uploaded our pics when were lil kids. hahaha... silly girls.. in short, we were discussing our future trip. well, more likely my own trip actually. i wanted to spend few days in kl with two of my sisters, b4 coming back here together for the school holidays. n that will include, socializing with some long lost friends.. haha.. yeah kl, here i come.. i dunno y i even bother to fly all the way across the ocean to a place i know i didnt particularly enjoy, but.. what the heck.. for whatever reason, we r gonna roll~~~

n im so so.. looking 4ward to the school holidays actually. it'd be nice to have more time running wild.. :P it brings back all those memories when i was young.. (yaii.. too old oredi...) i'd like to believe that all our siblings are pretty sporty. muahaha.. at least lia n i oredi made plans to go running at our kampong hilly sides. now thats an endurance challenge. see if we can tough out the mean terrains..

btw, this morning i change my route. when i went out to open the gate, i saw 5 big wild stray dogs barking at god knows what, so i freaked out. i didnt particularly love dogs, so i quickly drive away to the esplanade. i wanted to park there and hit my run straight to the marina beach, but then again, i saw few mat rempits lepaking there early in the morning. ni mesti kes mamat2 mabuk todi n tido kat esplanade. *sigh..* safety first.. so i drive away again. next port, to pantai bakbak.

pantai bakbak is like 20mins drive away from town. i parked and look around. no one else is here. of course la, its only 6.30am. so i plan my track. off me go running around the walking tracks on the road n off the road (the seaside track). the loop was about 1km. i made 1km without stopping (weee.. what an achievement :P) and then went for 2 more loops. thats about it. 3km n im so.. so.. done :P luckily, my thigh doesnt hurt anymore. im getting good at this.. :P

here are some of the scenic pics. i so love going to places like this. quiet n peaceful... next time, its the off road beach im fond of telling someone dear..

uwekks.. kasut bucuk sapo neh. muahaha... i still got blisters n its getting worse on both my pinkies. hu.. next time kene handiplas la tis pinkies..

still missing you...

pics shot while stranded in traffic jam

2009-10-17T17:01:00.000+08:00

like my previous short entry, i was in kk early in the morning to catch the start of the BIM (borneo international marathon 2009). i saw an advert in the local news paper the day earlier so i thot i might as well drive down early to see what it looks like, b4 i went to see my sister. but unfortunately, many roads were closed, and i was stuck in the traffic jam for like an hour.

so while idling away in the jam, i manage to snap few shots of the marathoners running by. it was a wet morning and not scorching hot like usual. so it was good to see some of the runners running by. there was this indian lady who was laughing n running n when she saw me, i wave at her n give her my thumbs up! i wanted to shout "WAY TO GO SISTER!!!" but im trying to control ayu at the moment. ahakz..n i saw this one old chinese guy who is a bit 'tempang', trying to have a decent run.. and its obvious that, almot 99% of the runners are either chinese or kadazans, n i saw only one malay lady wearing tudung..

thats all folks. im sending this via mms, my memory card cannot be read by this reader. dunno whats wrong with it.. time to get a new one maybe..

and it also occur to me, i wanted to buy a camera. previously, i wanted to buy a new laptop. but it seems that my laptop is now working fine. i was thinking of getting the nikon d60, but then, masa kat kedai, i saw so many cameras, i dont know which one is good. got canon eos la got panasoc lumix la, olympus, finepix etc.. aih.. i wish someone can tell me what to buy.. i googled but i still can make any decision... will somebody pls lend me an advice?

i heart you...

2009-10-17T16:06:00.000+08:00

there are so much things i wish i can do more lately..

- more time blogging. altho, i dont really have much ideas or thoughts to spare lately, coz i find politics to be somewhat not-worthy-to-discuss, for i'd be singing the same old song, only wif a different tune.

- more time to go out. im not really an outdoor person, but i love going places n sightseeing. one thing i like, is hiking masuk utan. muahahaha.. but my last hike was in 2007, with my old team, tracking up the 2km up to the entrance of Gua Niah in Sarawak. (2km is only the beginning, inside the caves, were miles n miles of tracks some more..) u see, i love this jungle trekking, but one thing i would never could tolerate are the bugs n centipedes, milipedes, n ultimately, the PACAT. yaikksss.. im going to have one of those massive heart attack if even one tiny pacat find its way and land on my leg. seriously.. i am so dem geli with dat lil bugger. n same goes to every lil tiny thing that resembles them.. so, while i love going for a hike, i am always ever so dilligent in maintaining distance from spots where u might find one of them bugger like muddy splotchy soils.. i remembered, while we were trekking at Niah, i stayed in the middle of the tracks, afraid that i might somehow caught that lil bugger if i swayed near the muddy banks.. hihi...

- more time with my sisters.. i find it sad that we were all living separately, so far away from each other.. i mean, the time b4 everybody got married is the only time we get to be young n spend the time away. but of course, we cant really all get what we want, so we just have to make do with whatever we have...

- i wish i can allocate some more time for my newly found hobby, altho today is only my first run after a while, i think its quite addictive. the knotted pain in my thigh has loosen up, n if i were to have it my way, i wanted to go out this evening for another run, but, then again, i have to go n stock up piles of goods for next week. see, my schedule is already jammed pack for the weekdays, n that will include the weekends as well..

- more trip to kk. i dont know why lately, i loved driving up to kk. altho it eats most of my weekend, but i found that driving is very 'therapeutic'. weird huh.. im still waiting for my father 'fortuner' to arrive, so that i can have a go at it. haha..

- switching business direction. been thinking alot about this. i mean, i love what im doing now, but it took up so much of my time, space and energy and leave me with so little time to even rest, sleep n enjoy whatever stuff that i wanted to do.. *sigh..* not that im being ungrateful, the money was more than i would ever wanted to, bless me, but i sincerely got tired of doing this. but, at the moment, working is what i needed.. for some reasons, working hard, being a certified workaholic has its advantage. it leaves u with less time to think about other things. working all the time is a nice distraction.

- there are many more items on my wishlist but lets leave it as it is for now. last but not least, right this minute, there is only one person that i really wish i could talk to.. but of course, that person would think that it was 'such a waste'..

running away... #1

2009-10-17T10:50:00.000+08:00

awh.. my feet hurts like hell. remember people. b4 u ever attempted any kind of running activities, pls make sure, u get urself a proper warming up. hihi.. i was so excited to go out this subuh, i forgot to do warm up. n now, i pay for it. all my muscles is now writhing in knotted pain, not to mention i got blisters in both my pinky toes. how i get blisters, its my brand new shoes.

it went something like this.

i woke up at around 5am. suddenly, i remember my new shoes n sweaters still somewhere in the shopping bag from last week. bugger. they were screaming for me to pick them up.. *sigh...* okay, i heard u. so i changed into my brand new outfit. muahahaha.. if u wanna do anything u think u might like, u might as well do it in style.. :-)

so there i was, brandishing my new sweater, my new running pants n my new shiny shoes. n not forgetting, the snow cap :P

the wind from the nearby sea is blowing ever so nicely as i snug comfortably in my thick hooded sweater. put on the hood, and off me go running into the twilight dawn... if u scroll n see the map i kindly googled from wikimapia, u'd see i started my run from the 'purple dot' straight up north.. until i reached the top most roundabout near the marina beach resort. from there, i took a turn down south till i reached the esplanade which was conveniently marked by the 'red lines'.

the esplanade part was nice. the wind was fierce a bit this morning, but i was already penat, my lungs felt like its gonna burst n my legs felt like it was glued on the ground... aww.. really penat.. cant really enjoy the wind when u are soaking sweat now can u? hehehehe.. that was my err.. fourth or fifth pit stop since i started running.. hihi.. ok2, i wasnt exactly running all the way, it was more like.. running, power walking, walking powerless, n slowly walking n running again.. hihi.. my first run is about 6-7km, and it took me about an hour. i know, its equivalent like snail trying to outrun a rabbit.. ahakz...

then, at the esplanade, i was just idling away, watching the orange sun making its appearance. it was a nice start. when u r that tired, ur mind tends to block away all things that been on ur mind, n it was a nice change for a start. it was pleasant stretching away n see the beautiful sea in front. all the things i love about this place. beautiful sea, nice n frienly people, modernization that never clouds ur perception about life, easy to make living, in short, i just love it here..

sapa yang rajin, klik sini untuk tgk real time map..
below is the partial map (click to see larger) indicating my first route. tomorrow morning, i might change to another route.. wanted to spend more time next to the marina...

someone dear refer me to this one running mom blog. now i can see why one can become so addicted to running. cant wait for tomorrow morning.. see if i can run slightly faster than today. hehe... wait, im not addicted to this yet, am i?

btw, i used to run when i was still a student. bese la, masa skolah2 dulu, penah jadik so-called-athlete that played basketball.. (nah, im not really that good, im just blessed with being taller than my average comrades). so, masa kat oz dulu, during weekends, me n ilmik, n few guys, apek nijam, pakli n the rest of the guys went for the 3 on 3 at the nearby school park. (hmm.. ayu, ko penah join tak kitorang main basketball? apasal ko slalu ilang time nih ha.. hihi..)

ilmik n i used to have thi morning run during the winter. but we never run together lar. she's living at the residential while i was living at this suburb apartment. next time i google the map. now im kinda lazy. hehe.. it was nice running thru the streets during winter, as u burn the fats but, u dont stink that much.. :p

now, all i have to do, is finding time so that i can fit in running in my busy daily schedule..

miss u so damn much..

innalillah..

2009-10-15T00:25:00.000+08:00

received message from a friend. memberitahu bahawa seorang akhwat jaipetra (mesir & kelantan), meninggal dunia dalam sebuah kemalangan jalanraya. allahyarham nazirah sidek dimaklumkan meninggal dunia setelah dilanggar lari oleh seorang remaja berusia 17 tahun dengan teman beliau yang memandu sebuah wira tanpa lesen melanggar kancil yang dinaiki allahyarham. allahyarham ketika itu sedang dlm perjalanan untuk mengambil baby beliau berusia 8 bulan di nursery... semoga roh beliau dicucuri rahmat ALlah dan semoga beliau aman dan tenang disana.. Ameen...

Bismillah..

Al-fatihah..

congrats

2009-10-12T00:12:00.000+08:00

tahniah pada semua petugas bagan pinang..
u are all.. astoundingly marvelous, exceeding expectations, and above all, u all are.. just.. amazing.
personally, i dont really give a ratass who wins. its kinda obvious where the vote will resides in the beginning.

but im so proud of the fact that u ppl put endless effort to change the inevitable.
and that, is priceless..

and that is something, only u guys have done it.

and.. as far as i can see.. u guys won the election.

screw the rest of 'em.

short

2009-10-11T23:33:00.000+08:00

hari ni sgt letih..

last nite - planning - small reunion - cannot pick up sister - boring - watch tv - Four Brothers - change of plan - texting frens - not going to make it to the reunion - better plan is in place.

today - 5am - start journey - tak sempat - borneo international marathon (BIM 2009) - took pictures - traffic jam - stranded - pick up sister - go brunch - go shopping - running shoes - sweater - almost bought nikon D60 - dunno if its cheaper here or on ebay - looking for 'it' - couldnt find 'it' anywhere

4pm - start journey back - sleepy - total distance travelled - 672km - tired

len kali full version.

hehe

06 Oktober 2009

2009-10-07T00:22:00.001+08:00

Hey hey.. someone turns 30 day. muahahaha.. our dear friend hanz, sudah menginjak zaman matang 30an. walaupun menurut beliau, beliau tidak merayakan sambutan hari jadi, tp im still gonna wish him Happy Birthday, semoga panjang umur, may u always find happiness within ur families n friends, wife and kids.. and may all the good things find its way to ur door, and all the bad things, find their way out of ur windows..

********************

its raining really heavy now. n i got this pounding headache, really2 hitting my brain from the inside. cant sleep, rasa cam my eyes going to pop out anytime. dr kol 8 dok try nak tido, tp bila tido jek, mesti terjaga balik dlm keadaan terkejut. like i was dreaming a really horrible dream, n balik2 terjaga dlm keadaan terkej n jantung dagdigdug.. what was that.. huh.. n its been giving me headache ever since till now... plus bnyk nya assignment tak buat lg nih, n pala pening plak tak leh nak fokus..

n it keeps slicing thru....

i'll be

2009-10-05T15:36:00.000+08:00

beautiful song..

i miss you..

memory revisited #8: my first fire fighting training

2009-10-04T20:55:00.000+08:00

masa muda2 dulu.. (ahakz).. den pernah join fire fighting training, special utk combat fire in oil n gas field. so satu hari ini, team kami punya turn la. our team consists of 20 org operators, 2 senior operators (supervisor) and of course me, the youngest process engineer, who insist on working on shift. hehehe..

so, on that fateful afternoon, kitorang naik fire truck, nak pi stesen yg terletak dlm plant jugak. sampai2 situ, kitorang kena tukar baju pakai baju fireman. tuh dierrrr... takde toilet pompuan. den dah la malu2 kucing2, kek mano la den nak tukar baju nih. the guys of course la selamba badak je tukar baju dlm bilik tuh. pastuh jaydee tunjukkan toilet kat belakang, suh tukar baju. he said, dun worry, i'll stand outside while u change. n the rest of the guys, of course, sengih bagai kucing jumpa ikan. dem...

siap pakai baju fireproof, suar pon fireproof, helmet secured, gloved secured, kitorang naik truck ala2 fireman. aih. berdebar2 jantung den. the guys dah byk kali poie trianing, but for me, this is my first. dari jauh, den nampak kat training ground, api menjulang tinggi dengan kepulan asap itam. mak aih, tinggi api tu mcm bangunan 5 tingkat. nak lemah lutut dent gk api beso camtuh.. dr jauh bleh rasa bahang beb..

smpi2 je, kapten bg briefing. hari ni punya task.. is to isolate the pipeline that leaked gasoline, so that the fire will be put out. maksudnya, senario hari tu ada gasoline yang bocor dr pipeline, menyebabkan kebakaran. so kena tutup main valve (kepala paip) yang menyalurkan gasoline tu. valve tu pulak, letaknya betul2 bawah api yg tengah marak tu.

so senior operator kitorang start briefing..

"hari ni task is simple, cuma nak isolate the valve from main pipelines. mcm biasa, kita pakai forward motion, one step at a time. we will create a water curtain to shield the leader who will crawl beneath the fire towards the valve"

oooohhh.. scary beb. cara nak matikan api tu, satu team akan pegang hos bomba tu, dan buat water curtain, mcm buat water spray la supaya api tu akan tertolak kebelakang n tak marak ke hadapan. supaya leader boleh merangkak ke bawah api yg menjulang tu dan tutup valve. almost too crazy to believe it..

"so, in an event of emergency, the highest ranking executive will automatically be the commanding officer. in this case, we have Evelyn as our commanding officer, and hence, she'll be our leader."

Oh...My...God...

the guys dah start sengih2. and im like.. what the hell? how am i going to crawl beneath the fire?

masa tu, lagi sekali, lutut den cam nak jadi jelly. degupan jantung den gile mcm nak melompat dr dada. adrenalin rush beb.. tp muka menten selamber. den just senyum2 jek. dlm hati bagai nak mati.... hahaha..

so, kitorang bagi kepada dua kumpulan, each team akan handle one hose. caranya, hos tu kena kepit kat ketiak kanan, dan bila kapten cakap "LEFT FORWARD", semua orang akan ambil satu langkah kedepan mula dgn kaki kiri. n kapten akan trus cakap forward..forward..HALT. bila sebut HALT, kapten akan set nozzle hose tu supaya water curtain terbentuk..

"FORWARD.. FORWARD..FORWARD.. HALT!! EVELYN, GO IN NOW!!"

and thats when i stepped out from the line and merangkak kebawah api yg tengah menjulang... masa tu, i was so dem scared, i dont have the time to think. the water curtain, air daripada hos tu menahan api dari marak n menjilat tanah.. n i was supposed to crawl n get the valve. so den pon dived into the fire, berdoa agar water curtain jgn pecah.. n berdoa.. jangan plak tetiba air habis..

giler panas toksah citer.. telinga den rasa berdengung.. i cant see anything because nak bukak mata sgttttt panas, n water everywhere... den meraba2 jek, terpegang besi panas.. uwaaaaa.. even pakai glove pun, rasa panas tu masiht erasa. raba2 lagi, rasa mcm valve, cepat2 pusing wpun rasa tangan mcm nak melecur.... tetiba, rasa kaki den kena tarik n sentap dengan ganasnya...

dem.. the guys suka suki jek tarik den mcm tarik anak ayam. siap sembur den ngan air tu.. wakakaka.. dem btol la. they were laughing so hard ok.. actually, i didnt get the joke.. and diorang cepat2 tanggalkan my helmet n my glove, to check for burns.. they tot i dah jadi ayam panggang kot. haha.. n then.. i heard them cheering.. siap bersorak bagai menang bola.. n jaydee told me, i was the first female ever attempted that particular training. muahahaha.... actually, i dont hear much of what they said, sbb masa tu, telinga den panas sgt smpi earwax cair beb.. haa.. tahi telinga buleh cair. bila den cabut ear plug, ewwww.. melted earwax.. :P

gambo bawah ni lebih kurang sama mcm training yg den citer nih. protective water curtain during fire source isolation.. imagine la kene merangkak kat bawah tu..n masa training kitorang dulu, the fire is much bigger..

actually, as the commanding officer, me no need to be the leader.i can always appoint someone else. but as usual, i was too naive to realize that, and i was too shy to say no, and was too proud to say im scared.. really, i always have problem of saying no to others..

have a nice week!

super typhoon parma: amaran ribut petir utara sabah

2009-10-02T20:06:00.006+08:00

ada hamba Allah yang tak dikenali nombornya, texting me. katanya:

"super typhoon parma 222 km/h winds is expected to hit northern philippines about midnite tonite. that means heavy rain & strong winds for us. stay home an stay safe".

thank you pada hamba Allah yang den tak pasti siapakah gerangannya.

sumber meteorologi disini:

SEKSYEN B: AMARAN RIBUT PETIR MENYELURUH
Aktiviti ribut petir yang berlaku di perairan Sabah barat (Bahagian Kudat dan Pantai Barat), WP Labuan dan Sarawak timur (Bahagian Bintulu dan Miri) dijangka berterusan sehingga lewat malam, Jumaat, 2 Oktober 2009.
Keadaan ini boleh menyebabkan angin kencang sehingga 40 kmsj dan laut bergelora dengan ombak boleh mencapai ketinggian 2.5 meter dan berbahaya kepada bot-bot kecil.

berita CNN:

malam nih dok rumah berdua jah ngan jane. as usual, our parents balik kampung for the weekend. so malam nih, cannot sleep, in case weather becomes too rough. our house nih just 2 minit je dari laut menghadap filipina. scary to think strong winds up to 222km/h would swept across the ocean to our doorstep.

on a lighter note.. finally, my long awaited present arrived..

its a novel by chuck palahniuk.. never read it b4, tp dah pernah tgk movie dia. brad pitt n edward norton berlakon. im going to enjoy reading is, sbb ada orang tu kata, i am very anti-consumerism, which means, i dont fall into capitalist trap, i am not attracted to advertisement, i am not interested in shopping and whatnots. tak sabar nak baca..

p/s: kinda miss u.. n im so sorry..

my first love letter..

2009-10-01T18:32:00.001+08:00

i mean.. my first ~~love letter~~ SAMAN. muahahaha...

tongahari tadi den terkocoh2 nak kuar beli barang. masuk kedai runcit tambi nih, order barang, pastu masuk kete, tunggu le pekeje tambi tu load masuk kete. siap dabel parking nih depan kedai. tgh2 tunggu tu, den nampak dr jauh ada kete pulis lalu jalan yg sama.. ahh.,sudah. kene blah plak. barang tak masuk kete lagi. takpe2, seberang jalan nampak ada parking. den pon dgn segera kornar baring kat u turn depan n park cantik2 seberang kedai... tp kete pak pulis nih ikot membontoti kete den.. tetiba dia park tepi kete den...

kuar lah 3 org pulis yg agak segak ngan uniform.. sorang bediri depan kete, sorang tepi seat penumpang, sorang bediri tepi pintu den. mak aih..kene kepung ngan polis. giler terasa mcm criminal. apo hal pulis2 nih??? den telanggar anak kucen tgh jalan tadi ke? langgar kete sapa2 ke? mana ada. den cuma drift kat u turn je td. salah ke????

"selamat tghari cik, sila tunjuk lesen.."
oh dem.. den tak bawak dompet. tadi kuar gulung2 je duwet masuk poket jeans. mampus den kali ni...

"alamak.. tuan.. saye lupa bawak lesen.. sorry..."

"cik, tak bawak lesen tu adalah satu kesalahan. mana boleh sorry2.. sila tunjuk kad pengenalan.."

"alamak.. tuan.. saye lupa bawak dompet.. semua sekali saye lupe.."
giler rasa cam loser nak mampus. mesti pulis tu ingat den tertinggal otak den kat umah gak. mesti dia nak cakap drive tanpa otak juga adalah satu kesalahan.. pulis three stooges nih dah start berpandangan sama sendiri...

"cik, hari ni cik buat banyak kesalahan besar. cuba cik tgk, lampu brek ketiga cik tak menyala, lampu reverse pon tak menyala. cik pulak memandu tanpa bawak lesen.."
alah, dia nak suh den step out dr kete den ke. giler panas kat luar tu. takde keje den nak tercegat kat tepi jalan tgh panas2 nih. bila masa plak sumer lampu2 kete den nih meninggal dunia?? nih mesti sbb tehentak semmlm kat roller.

"ye ke? alamak.. sorry tuan.. sy tak perasan.. maaf lah, sy tak perasan sangat pulak lampu2 nih nak mati ari nih.. semlm elok je.. kenapa pulak ari nih dia semua fail?"
wakakkaa.. den sendiri rasa nak tergelak mendengar perkataan yg keluar dr mulut den. pulis three stooges tu pon blur dengan soalan den. siap den plak yg tanya diorang... hahaha...

"sebab itu lah, dalam kelas latihan memandu, semua pemandu diarahkan memeriksa lampu brake dan semua lampu dan memastikan ciri2 keselamatan dipatuhi sebelum memulakan perjalanan.."
wakakaka.. lagi den rasa nak gelak smbil hentak kepada kat stereng. siap kene sekolah lagi oleh pak pulis nih...

"maaf lah tuan, sy betul2 tak perasan.. pagi tadi saya sorang2 kat rumah, mcm mana saya nak cek lampu belakang kalau sy kena duduk kat depan nih.. maaf lah tuan.. sy janji tak buat lagi.."

masa nih lah den senyum ala2 bulan mengambang 15. sikit lagi den nak kenyit mata kat pulis sorang nih. panjang giler doa den dlm hati.. tulung la.. mau kene tiga empat ratus nih. pls pls... abis le untung den niaga ari nih. warghhhhhh... polis sorang tu, pegi kat polis yg berdiri kat depan kete den. dioran cam bincang2. den wat muka innesen bagai tak pernah buat dosa... smbil mata terkebil2 tgk depan...

"macam nih la cik. kali ni kami lepaskan. tp sbb banyak sgt kesalahan cik, kita kena saman jugak. kami saman paling murah la. saman tak bawak lesen je. lima puluh ringgit. maaf ye, nak tak nak mmg kene jugak. kalau ikut, cik kene 300 nih."

"errr.. tak boleh kurang lagi ke.."

"tak boleh. nih saman paling ringan dah ni.. kalau ikut, cik dari tadi tak pakai seat belt jugak nih. patut kena saman automatik tak pakai tali pinggang.."

"oh ye ke.. sy baru je bukak seat belt nih.. terima kasih bnyk2 sbb saman saye paling murah.."
wakakaka.. kantoi tak pakai seatbelt...

"tolong isi nama dan no ic kat borang nih. lain kali cik, jgn kemana2 tanpa ic dan lesen yer.."

"betul betul betul.... janji lepas ni saya tak lupe dah..."

warhahahaha.. mcm mana la bleh kantoi. giler malu den, dah la depan kedai bnyk orang. sumer org pandang den smbil sengih2. yo la.. muka familiar kat kedai tuh maaa... sampai2 je kantin, den amik hp. tak puas hati. nih mesti sbb kifarah dosa2 den. mana aci den sorang kene.. dak xenan n berg wajib kene sama!! diorang geng wat ketupat. wakakaka..

mula2.. berg.. "berg, den kene saman. ekau wajib bayarkan saman den. ekau nyer pasal la semua nih!!"
berg: "baper inggit? wakakka.. bak no akaun" ceh.. iyer2 jek.

tapi, paling klasik, smpi den nak kejang gelak is xenan. dasat giler dia nyer balasan kifarah jadi kroni AT. padan muka.. muahahaha.. gelak dulu..

"edi, den kene saman!!"

"u nak tau tak, i tengah tersadai tepi jalan.hahaha. van takde minyak. susah pakai van sewa nih..tuh la, kifarah jd kroni AT. kene tunggu minyak jap nih"

wakakakaka.. sekurang2nya, saman 50inggit takde la dasat sgt berbanding kete tesadai tepi jalan takde minyak.. hihihi...

my first crush

2009-09-29T11:38:00.000+08:00

haha.. i mean, my first crash.

4 jam sebelumnya..
on the way dari kedai, sbb nak cepat, tak perasan pulak ada jalan rosak kat depan. siap ada steam roller tgh ratakan jalan dgn batu itam bitumen. cuma sempat brek.. screeeech... tak sempat sgt stop, if perasan 3 minit sblm tu, mungkin tak hentam roller tu, tp alhamdulillah, sempat pusing sikit, so pintu penumpang menghentam steam roller itu.

dem.. kemik pintu. nak call jane, adik ipar, or my bapak also cannot. hanfon dr pagi tinggal kat rumah. sux gile. keta tak rosak pon.. cuma i was a bit shocked. kepala lutut rasa mcm jadi jeli. my first ~~crush~~ crash.bertahun bawak keta, tak penah kena saman, tak penah langgar atau scratchkan kereta. hari ni la plak baru nak kena. aih..

so, org yg wat construction tu mcm pandang pelik je kat den. dia ingat den terhantuk ke ape. i cakap im ok je. bg 5 minit jap, nanti i drive sendiri balik. hahaha.. bukan rosak enjin pun. cuma kemik saja.. mcm terjaga dr mimpi plak. my brain agak2 mushy sikit. sgt distracted.

i swear, one of this day, im going to get myself killed behind my own keta buruk.

so, skang kat umah, rehat jap sejam. kena balik meniaga semula nih. hu... tak bg tau sesapa pun lg. if anyone ask, i'll just say scratch tepi penghadang. lgpun, sempat singgah n ketuk sikit kat bengkel td. haha.. malas ler kalu kene bebel.. drop my water face only.

balik td, rasa cam sejuk2 je badan. tekejut lg kot. pasang lagu.. haha.. my fav song, kebetulan. pehh.. lagu ni dulu pernah i n kawan2 nyanyi bagai nak rak atas bot on the way from ppulau labuan to pulau papan, one of those trip yg sgt best..i ingat masa tu, hari cam nak ribut, so we tot, if the boat sink, at least, we have been singing while it happened. gile.. haha.. bleh plak teringat jaman2 muda dgn keta yg dah kemik. hehe.. layan je la..

Every step I take, every move I make
Every single day, every time I pray
I'll be missing you
Thinkin of the days, when you went away
What a life to take, what a bond to break
I'll be missing you

slicing thru..

2009-09-29T02:41:00.000+08:00

pernah tak terasa, secara tiba2, rasa agak2 sedih n suddenly, ur heart went cold. how do i say this, mcm a knife slicing thru ur heart. its like.. zingggggg.. u can actually feel it. sampai kena letak tgn atas dada belah kiri, coz u can acually feel the knife slicing thru. rasa cold.. withering..

baru nk tido, tp kena letak tangan atas dada.. something.. slicing thru..

shud not, would not, can not, shall not..

never think.

:)

the blower's daughter

2009-09-26T22:58:00.001+08:00

wahaha.. den cam tak caya den tgh enjoy tgk game bola mlm nih. smbil men tenet smbil tgk liverpool vs hull city. baru minit ke 51 nih beb tapi torres dah score 3 bijik. 3-1 dah beb. hot giler game nih. tak macam everton vs portsmouth td. bosan giler..muahahaa.. giler sexy torres nih. baru perasan malam nih.. :p

ok keadaan rumah den sgt kucar kacir skearang nih. the gurls, my adik2 yg kaki bola nih tgh dok depan tv khusyuk tgk bola. the gurls nih sgt fanatik bola, siap main fantasy football n ada liga dlm staduim astro. laptop besepah2 kat ruang tamu nih. siap jane ngan asben dia main game mafia wars kat facebook lg.. hanya den sorang saja yg tengah.. tengah... :p

meanwhile, tgh2 layan bola n tenet nih, someone dear dedicate this beautiful song for me.. hope u all enjoy it as much as i do :)

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her skies

I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you

And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We'll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower's daughter
The pupil in denial

I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you...
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind...
My mind...my mind...
'Til I find somebody new