the art of scoring a job (or perhaps, the art of manipulation)

my last memory revisited #3 prompted me to share this. a prominent malaysian company came to our college and asked to interview all of us. the chosen ones. we havent graduated yet, and it wasd in the middle of our final year exam. i still got two exam papers the next day and still have to prepare for the interview. it was crazy. i didnt sleep because i need to study n the interview was giving me butterfly in my stomach. because the rumours had it that the panel of interviewers were bunch of Vice Chairmans that are known to be ruthless. but i expect nothing less. they had to be ruthless otherwise, they wont be the VC now wud they?

here are some of the tips, which is based on my experiences.

1. try to dress nice n simple, wear something that shows character. i dun want to sound rude or biased or anything, but this is my advice for the gurls. try to avoid wearing baju kurung to an interview session. this is specially true if u r applying for a technical position, ie engineering. but if u r going to be a financial analyst, or economist, or teachers, or secretary, u may consider wearing baju kurung. but still, i strongly advice u aganst it. its nothing personal. its all about the tactics.

2. if its a structural interview, they may have u answering q's about ur personality type. NEVER TRY TO CHEAT. NEVER!. dun go answering questions to show that u r driven, u r motivated. NEVER. answer the personality q's as honest as possible. it doesnt matter. but if u cheat, they will know. the personality test was mainly designed to check for personality disorder. if u cheat, THEY WILL KNOW. trust me on this. u might as well be known as the quiet type rather than the socially-unstable-aka-mentally-retarded person. hihihi.. that was funny :p

3. keep a straight face. keep the poker face. leave ur emotion outside the room. i ingat masa i nak masuk bilik interview, i said to myself "ok, this is it. im going in empty". maksudnya, dun feel anything. focus. REALLY FOCUS. its a war, not a battle. U CANNOT LOSE THIS WAR. keep that in mind. be ready to fight, but dont let the enemy know u r striking. keep smiling, poker face!.

4. there might be questions that wil surprise you. remember, be calm. they will try to break u, tanya u soalan yg akan merendah2kan ur level, try to attack u emotionally and intelectually. i ingat, one of the panel asked me this:
"well, we are looking for a bright person, but i can see from ur transcript, you had failed statics two times. FAILED A SUBJECT TWO TIMES??!! what makes u think u deserve to join us? this company doesnt need a loser like you".
AHAAA!! how do u answer that humiliating q's? giler memalukan punya soalan. even the other interviewers were shocked. i was soooooo shocked. but remember. poker face. shows nothing on ur face. i just smiled. smile sweetly as i can. altho, i was panicking inside. i cannot feel my legs. even lidah pun terkelu. kuang hajo punya org tua. hihi..

so i said.. " i might have failed two times, but i succeed the third time. failed a subject? it was nothing really, in fact, i had three more semester to master the subject. and now, i am an expert in statics for having studied it three times. if u want, i can teach u some of the things that i learnt in statics.."

hahaha.. i remembered them laughing so hard. i wasnt laughing ok. poker face, remember? i just sat there, looking comfortable, tp dlm hati, i was so scared. i thought, i shud not have said that. but they thought it was funny. hihi.. the thing is, u gotta show them that u r composed. u r able to handle pressure. u r prepared for anything. thats what they wanted to know whether u got it or not. if u can get thru that, than u wud be fine.

5. you wud be drilled till they thought u cannot handle it. i was asked whether i wud be able to jump from a bridge, whether i wud be able to marry n have kids, which one is important, family or career, they will ask you all sorts of things tat will caught u by surprise. but remember. poker face. doesnt matter how much u want to scream and say "ushut up u stupid old git", but remember, BE CALM. jgn lose control or lose ur temper.

and remember one more thing, if they asked you to choose, for example, which one is more important, career or family. or maybe they will ask you, wud u prefer working in malaysia or abroad. when presented with these kind of q's, quickly transform urself to be THE POLITICIAN. maksudnya, answer them back in riddles. berteka-teki dgn mereka. dun give a straight answer. IT IS A TRAP!! NI SOALAN PERANGKAP!! if u choose one, they will never stop bullying u!

kenapa i ckp mcm nih? because if u r smart, it was never about the choices u have to make. its about, fitting the choices to suit ur need. remember that. the average IQ person will struggle to choose and justify their choice,however, smart people with over-the-top-IQ will manipulate the choices and justify their manipulation techniques. ahaa.. hihihi.. the thing is, be calm, be reasonable, be smart.. :)

one more last thing to note. for example, if u r an engineering student, they will sometimes ask you to describe the process of building something, such as, explain to me how do u extract oil from the sea. it is important to remember this. dont answer them based on ur technical knowledge. the purpose why they asked you is not to judge ur technical knowledge. it is to know ur potential.

the whole purpose of an interview is to know the limit and ur potential, and how far wud u go given the opportunity to work with them.

give them an insight to show them u know the technical skills, but dont stop there. show them u are a leader. this is the most important thing. VERY IMPORTANT. talk as if you are the CEO of the company. talk about the future of the company if they go on with the project. relate the whole situation with how much MONEY the project wud be able to generate. talk about how the whole project will benefit the country and how will it contribute to the world. talk as if you OWN the company. talk as if the company is YOURS.

this is the borderline that define the average graduates with the promising graduates. typical graduates will just talk about "ok, we set up pipelines that goes from here n there, we check n develop a team, blablabla.." the interviewers already know that u can do the project, IT IS IN UR TRANSCRIPT. but what they dont know is, ur perspective, ur insights, ur capability to lead, ur whole potential as a future leader, ur way of thinking. these are the qualities that they wanted to know whether u got it or not. because these skill and abilities are not written down on ur transcript.

lastly, my whole interview took 1hour and 45minutes. that is how long i was tortured inside that room. org lain dlm setgh jam jek. all my frens were waiting for me outside because i was the last person on the list that day. but the next day, when i was on my way to my exam, one of the 'kerani' of the company, came looking for me. he said that i scored the highest on that interview, level 6 (level ni reserved only for senior general managers) and that, all i have to do, is do well on my last exams. hihihi.. i was so happy i was singing all the way to the exam hall. :p

ok.. i think that will be enuff for now. happy reading :) if u got more q's pls dun hesitate to ask.. ahakz... (poyo jek rasa :p )

:)


p/s: this is a true story. based on my experiences. kalau bunyi berlagak, it was MEANT to sound dat way. hihi :p